Build or Ruin

By Rakesh K Mittal IAS on 23-08-2014

While I was the commissioner of Lucknow, a woman aged about 35 years came to see me alongwith an elderly lady. The elderly lady was a reputed person, known for her good social work. She told me that the young woman was undergoing a dispute with her husband and despite several years of separation, the divorce case was not coming to an end. The woman had no source of income, as a result of which, she was on the verge of ruin. She wanted me to intervene in the matter and get the divorce case decided early so that she could start getting some alimony. In this process she had become very weak as well as bitter and wanted to see her husband completely ruined. 
I listened to the lady carefully but expressed my inability to intervene in court proceedings. After some contemplation, I offered my help to the lady in a different way and put two alternatives before her. The first was that she uses her energy in ruining her husband and the second was to use the same for building her life. I also added that the first alternative was detrimental to both, while the second would benefit them. Then I advised her to choose the second one. She felt that my advice was appropriate and requested me to advise further. Fortunately, the lady was educated and had a place to live. A friend of mine had very recently set up a school in the same locality. I had a hunch that the school might have some vacancies for teachers. Immediately I rang up my friend and talked about it. In fact, I insisted him to provide this lady a suitable job in the school and he agreed to do so. 
The very next day the lady went to the school and was appointed as a teacher. Naturally, I as well as the lady were quite happy at this development. Few months later, this lady met me at a function of another branch of the same school. By that time her personality had transformed completely. She was happy as well as healthy. There was no mention of her divorce case and she was no more worried on that account. It gave me great joy and satisfaction to see that she had really deployed her energy in building her life rather than in ruining her husband’s life. 

About The Author

Rakesh K Mittal IAS

Sri Rakesh Kumar Mittal IAS (Retd.) had been an administrative officer in Uttar Pradesh state cadre for about 35 years. He is a spiritual man with high moral values and a selfless heart. He has founded 'Kabir Peace Mission'. He has also written several books on positive thinking.