Don’t Touch Me!

By Kaimlet on 11-07-2017

An Irishman in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Irishman looked across the restaurant and asked, “Is that Jesus sitting over there?” The waitress nodded “Yes,” so the Irishman told her to give Jesus a cup of coffee on him.The next patron to come in was an Englishman with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, “Is that Jesus over there?” The waitress nodded, so the Englishman said to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, “My treat.” The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Redneck on crutches.  He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, “Hey there, sweet thing. How’s about gettin’ me a cold glass of Coke! “He, too, looked across the restaurant and asked, “Is that God’s boy over there?” The waitress once more nodded, so the Redneck said to give Jesus a cold glass of Coke, “On my bill.”

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Irishman, touched him and said, “For your kindness, you are healed.” The Irishman felt the strength come back into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out of the door. Jesus also passed by the Englishman, touched him and said, “For your kindness, you are healed.” The Englishman felt his back straightening up, and he raised his hands, praised the Lord and did a series of back flips out of the door.

Then Jesus walked towards the Redneck. The Redneck jumped up and yelled, “Don’t touch me…I’m drawin’ disability (pension).”

Comment: God and religion are all fine, as long they do not touch me, much less my way of life or my pocket.

About The Author

Fr Jose Kaimlet

Fr Jose Kaimlet, is a catholic priest known all over the world mostly for his humanitarian service life and the big collection of thought provoking moral stories, ‘Tonic for the Spirit’. Kaimlet is a committed social worker, who has spent much of his time among the aged and the destitute far and wide. So far he has established many rehabilitation centres and old age homes. Since 2014, he is fully in Tanzania and now building a cancer hospital at Msolwa village in Ujamaa.