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Personality

Personality generally means those qualities that describe an individual. Gordon Allport, a well-known personality psychologist, who extensively studied personality of individuals, their traits and characteristics, defined personality as “the dynamic organisation within the individual of those psychophysical systems that determine his characteristic behaviour and thought”. When we generally talk about a person as having a good or bad personality, we are talking about how a person makes a good or bad impression on us. We look at the characteristics of a person that stand out. Persons in our interactions with them are making positive or negative impressions on us and we make quick decisions on how we like them and can easily get along or not with them. We often observe their ease, gait, mannerisms, friendliness, and warmth. In a consumerist culture making impressions has become an art in itself as impressions in presentations, advertisements, and commercials sell products to be bought and consumed. Needless to say,  most persons are affected by superficial impressions rather than substance. The word, persona, is a Latin word, that originally meant a mask whereby a person played different roles or characters on the stage.
And from very early on in life we are playing different roles on our stage that is the whole world. Personality then is our unique adjustment, that we think is helpful for us, and that stands invariably between us and our world. Our personality is formed by our fears and anxieties, domination or submission, aggression or suffering of aggression, and superstitions and rituals to deal with anxieties or unknown, often primitive, forces and elements. When various tensions   arise within us, they motivate us to act in healthy ways to reduce those tensions, and our personality comes to a healthy and benign adjustment. A way of adjusting or responding to violence, for instance, changed the whole world in a positive way when Christ taught humanity to suffer violence rather than to respond to violence in kind. Non-violent civil disobedience, certainly rooted in the view of St. Thomas Aquinas that unjust laws did not bind the citizen in conscience, effectively developed by Henry Thoreau deeply influenced Mahatma Gandhi in developing the practical art of fighting tyranny and achieving legitimate human rights.  Obviously responding to violence in two diametrically opposed ways forms two different kinds of personalities. Really who we are is what we do.
Generally Eastern personalities are considered to be passive-aggressive personality-wise. They try to hold unpleasant stuff within, and then try to release in small explosions or in one big bang. In other words, they are aggressive even when they are passive. Western personalities in general are less likely to have the tolerance or patience in enduring suffering, and more likely to strike out and be aggressive faster than their eastern counterparts. Of course, there is the danger of stereotyping, and the personality characteristics that differentiate the eastern and the western personalities are disappearing over time as the world is becoming one due to increased intercourse and migrations.
Actually I should have high-lighted love and truth more than violence and aggression. However, violence and corruption seem to be gaining more ground, at least in the short run, than truth and love. Ultimately truth and love will win. As the New Year is near, it is good to take stock of our own personality traits and dispositions that will determine the success of truth and love.

A WORLD OF ILLUSION

Yesterday, my usual day of silence, solitude, and reflection during the week, my wife asked me why I was sad. Ordinarily I do not speak that day. Ashram residents rarely talk to me on that day. I showed her an article entitled “America’s 20 richest people have more money than these 152 million people”. These 20 wealthiest people worth $732 billion have more wealth than the 152 million persons who form the least wealthy 50% of U. S. households according to a study released on December 2, 2015 by the Institute for Policy Studies, a Washington, D.C.-based think tank. Offshore tax havens and tax loopholes facilitate this scandalously enormous disparity. I was shocked. Later on the same day another shocking news of a senseless shooting at a holiday party in San Bernardino, California, killing at least 14 people, was reported. This event is not unusual anymore. The unwillingness of the US federal legislatures to make effective gun control laws enables guns, to a large extent, into the hands of criminal and mentally disordered persons. My intention here is not to single out one country with regard to financial and criminal atrocities. It is merely to highlight the fact that if such events are happening in a country that is claimed to be one of the most advanced in human rights, what can be said about other countries that openly flout human rights and suppress freedom?! What can tell us about leading democracies wherein success in election is based on the amount of money each candidate raises?!
I would to like at another area: the great messages of great world leaders. I would like to select two in particular: Jesus Christ and Narayana Guru. Both came from very humble circumstances. Both gave similar message to humanity. Christ preached the Kingdom of God and the love of humanity as the indispensable criterion/condition for that kingdom. Narayana Guru taught one God, one Caste, and one Religion for humans. They did not found religions. Many of the followers of Christ, a most oppressed and persecuted group in the Roman Empire, became the oppressors themselves after the conversion of Emperor Constantine to Christianity. Narayana Guru had three caste Hindus (a Brahmin, a Menon, and a Nair) among his close early disciples and Sanyasins (monks). What happened to Christianity? Most of its leaders are more concerned about material prosperity than about spirituality. The present Pope, conservative though he is, trying to preach the teachings of Christ, especially his love and compassion, is not well-received in many conservative circles. What about Narayana Guru? His stature as a world teacher is greatly diminished by reducing him, a casteless guru (teacher), to an organisation, SNDP (Sree Narayana Dharma Paripalana) Yogam, that is controlled by one caste. Christ does not fare any better. Most Christians engaging in long rituals and prayers devoid of the spirit of Christ imprison him in Christianity (Christian religion) diminishing his role as a model teacher for the whole world.
What about you and me? Yes, I am a hypocrite too. I live a lifestyle in the Ashram that is, perhaps, above the 90th percentile as far as the total world population is concerned. I fall and rise. Right now I am aware of my own daily tensions (the discrepancy between what I ought to do and what I end up doing) and, perhaps, rationalisations as I talk about other hypocrites! Is this not really a world of illusion that we are really living in?! When shall we become aware and become gurus ourselves?!

SPIRITUALITY AND RELIGIONS

Spirituality is universal; it is for all persons. Persons belong to different religions; religions are not universal. Spirituality is predominantly about mysticism that involves direct communion with the ultimate reality or intuitive experience of God. Religions are predominantly about asceticism that involves spiritual discipline, rites, and rituals that go with individual religion. While different religions and asceticism can lead to mysticism, a mystic has a subjective insight or experience that is unique. That unique experience needs not be specific to any religion. While mystics may engage in rituals that belong to the religion that they come from, they are beyond these rituals. Religions want their members to faithfully follow their teachings and rituals. Mysticism has no chartered course or program. Mysticism is widely open, and, in some way, mysticism begins where religions end.
All are called to be mystics. Mystics are such because they have gone through rigorous training and discipline either in institutions or society at large that include religions. Humans are born into and live in interactional settings that call for fundamental principles and basic regulations. Those humans who are capable of mysticism have a clear conscience and are divested of their ego and egoistic attachments. They are altruistic and will not intentionally hurt another human. They will be very sensitive to their environment. Their union with the creator in their spirituality will imply everyone’s welfare as well as oneness of humanity. They partake in their own way in the vision and attitude of the creator, and want to deal with everyone and everything the way the creator deals with. They are not concerned about what happens to them as long as they know they are carrying out God’s will and plan for them the best way they understand. While they learn from everyone and everywhere in order to form themselves to be the persons the Great Consciousness and Supreme Truth wants them to be, they are beyond models and personalities of this world. Their identity is not based on any achievement or any connection outside of themselves.
Religions evolved from their founders or teachers or inspirers. Spirituality was from the beginning of creation. Spirit ordered life was imprinted in the humans right from the beginning. This spirit life was manifested through conscience especially to those persons who withdrew from worldly pursuits, who went in pursuit of truth, and who tried to unravel the purpose of creation, and who, above all, live according to the will of God at any cost. Purity of intention, empathy, and a spirit of reconciliation and harmony with the entire creation characterise the daily life of such persons. They withdraw themselves from the world to examine themselves in solitude, silence, and total inner freedom their relationship with God. Their union with God is marked by complete and unconditional surrendering. Religions came into being when humans lost themselves in the wilderness of disordered pleasures and inordinate affections. They point to realities beyond this world. Mysticism coming from spirituality is our end.

Living Simply Living Godly

The entire spectrum of vegetative and animal life both on land and in water in the world can reach their destiny without any problem. Living for them is instinctively imprinted in their very being. They live simply in a pre-determined way and thrive in nature. Interestingly, humans endowed with intelligence and freedom have the greatest difficulty in reaching their natural destiny or final goal whether it be heaven, paradise, salvation, moksha (liberation or self-realisation), or nirvana (the state of perfect happiness and peace). That free and intelligent humans cannot achieve their goal or salvation without mighty feats and that too often going against their own nature beats my understanding. Even if I were to understand it, I do not want to accept it, because there is no earthly reason for salvation to be so difficult. I cannot think of a God or Messiah who would make salvation nearly unreachable for human beings. So I conclude without any hesitation that human beings knowingly or unknowingly brought this problem upon themselves. As human beings created the problem, they need to solve it.
I did not question until recently the ingenious story of human fall on account of disobedience to God as narrated in the first book of Genesis of the Bible. Neither did I question moksha that is liberation from samsara (the cycle of death and re-birth) or paripurna- Brahmanubhava (the complete experience of Brahma or the One Supreme Self) found in Hinduism, Buddhism, and Jainism. We are not encouraged to question; we are merely asked to believe. Besides questioning basic traditional beliefs is not considered to be kosher. After having lived through good and bad experiences on my way to a ripe old age, I am appropriating my right to question and scrutinise everything in my final stage of search for truth. Here I want to make sure that I do not intend to question anyone’s belief system. I only ask everyone to come to one’s beliefs after due reflection and deliberation. As humans as God’s children are in various stages of perfection, I feel I can use a good guru or model on my way to God. For me that prime good guru is Christ on account of what he said and how he lived.
The best theological, philosophical, psychological, and scientific insights as human heritage are there for all to benefit from. Everyone has a duty to examine them. After studying them thoroughly, everyone has an obligation to come to one’s own conclusions. With the available knowledge one has to form one’s own conscience, that then becomes the informed, supreme guide in everything. I am well aware that there are officials of religions, who would question this stance as misguided because according to them a good conscience has to function in accordance with the teachings of their religions. I strongly believe that a good conscience is a sincere conscience that has taken relevant facts and knowledge into consideration before coming to a decision.
I want to firmly assert that liberation or salvation does not require heroic acts. Living a simple life that discerns God’s will as communicated to one’s conscience and puts that into practice every day is all that is required to reach one’s salvation. I cannot think of a God’s will that does not include the love of all creation especially humans. We can all be comforted by the thought that come from Scriptures that for those who love God and humankind everything works unto good. This life is not only simple but blessed and divine.

Searching for Truth

Searching for truth is the most difficult thing in the world. That may be the reason why such a  few persons are engaged in it. The prevailing myths for telling untruths are: 1. Nobody tells the truth, or everybody tells lies 2. One cannot get ahead or succeed in life without telling a few lies, and 3. It is alright to tell harmless or white lies. It is important to respond to these myths:  1. If nobody tells the truth, this very statement is true or false; if it is true, there is at least that much truth; if the statement is false, then persons do tell truth. 2.  One can get ahead or succeed in life in the long run without telling lies or seriously compromising one’s integrity; when you compromise your integrity you are not there anymore. If you are used to telling lies to get your ways, start telling the truth to experience the spiritual and emotional joy and satisfaction you get. Of course if your conscience has become dull and insensitive, then you may have to retrain your conscience to reach the desirable level of sensitivity to experience peace and satisfaction. 3. There are no such things as harmless lies; any lie that we say dulls our conscience, and renders us less and less capable of making the right kind of discernment that is necessary for our ultimate purpose and goal in life, that is, freedom from all kinds of bondage. That is why Christ so emphatically said that only truth can set us free. It is also very relevant to remember what Mark Twain, a great author and humorist once said: “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything”.
It is very difficult to live in a materialistic, consumerist world without being tainted by it. Here I am reminded of the story of the Rich Fool told by Christ. Warning against one’s greed, he said that a man’s life is not made secure by what one owns even one has more than one needs. To illustrate this point he spoke of a rich man having a good harvest from his land. The rich man built big storage bins to put his grains and other goods to save them for many years to eat, drink, and be merry knowing little that he would die that very night. The story is not against judicious saving but against hoarding, unwillingness to share, and inordinate attachment to things. Not telling what needs to be told truthfully in a detached way and keeping in mind also the interest of the persons told to at the time it needs to be told is detrimental to the physical, emotional, and spiritual welfare of all concerned. Telling what persons need to hear and not what they want or like to hear requires a strong and assertive personality that keeps depression and other emotional problems away. Getting systematic and irrefutable facts, which means not getting caught up in gossips or rumours, is essential for a searcher after truth who also deals with people. Truth is often inconvenient but that alone can save.

Healthy Detachment

I know someone who, after having gone through a very painful experience, and after having plunged into total despair and hopelessness, is learning to regain his meaning and purpose in life. His story briefly is this. His wife retired from her job three years before he did, and went to live with their youngest daughter in another state. Their oldest daughter lives in another country. He educated both his daughters, his only children, to the point that both of them have very good jobs. He even got a specialist orthopaedic surgeon from London to India to correct his oldest daughter’s previous surgery due to an accident so she can walk. He was totally dedicated to his wife and children. The only thing that may not have sat well with his wife and daughters was his criticism of his youngest daughter’s loose life. All his life’s dreams dashed, he was totally devastated and did not want to live. However, under the correct conditions, he was able to regain his health and enjoy life through healthy detachment.
All of us at some point or another in our life have gone through painful or even extremely painful experiences due to no fault of our own. Some of our near ones who tortured us out of their own fear, or others who opposed us for their own gain might think that we would be better dead than alive. We do not need to despair. We have great historical examples of Socrates, Christ, Saint Paul, Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, and Martin Luther King, Jr., to cite a few, who suffered for the values and principles they stood for. We can emerge spiritually and emotionally wholesome from such destructive experiences and persons only through healthy detachment and from a deep abiding faith in ourselves and ultimately in a Higher Power or God beyond us yet deep and more intimate than ourselves within us.
Healthy detachment is essential for growth in spiritual life. It is letting go completely and unconditionally believing a Higher Force (God) is going to hold us in life unharmed. It  is indispensable for lasting and meaningful solution to any problem in life. Spiritual authors call it holy indifference or affective neutrality. Holy indifference, for instance, is expressed in Christian marriage vows wherein one spouse promises to hold his/her partner in bond and love for ever in good times or bad times, health or sickness, wealth or poverty. A great spiritual writer, Ignatius of Loyola, in his well-known Spiritual Exercises, proposed this kind of indifference for making right choices in one’s life, and union with God and service of humanity. This kind of indifference or detachment sees one sailing through life with even-mindedness and even-handedness in benign as well hostile situations. A person with healthy detachment does not have inordinate or disordered attachments or affections. This person carefully discerns the messages contained in favourable and unfavourable events in life. This person celebrates life and lives life fully in the present moment, and totally surrenders self actively to God and to the inevitable happenings that one is helpless in avoiding. The total surrendering of life to God as self-oblation expressed through total service of humanity, and unreserved and full celebration of life can happen only through healthy detachment.

Formula for Life

Salvation for humanity consists in unity of humanity. Humanity’s destination then is unity of humanity collectively, and self-realisation coming out of exhausting all potentials one is endowed with to become what can be individually. How can we all live in a multicultural, pluralistic society and achieve unity of humanity? It is difficult all the more as differences like colour, creed, race, ethnic origin, and class are more focused on than unifying forces like character, value system, human rights, equality, equity, and fairness. In a world where quality of life is measured by the extent and intensity of pleasure rather than by purposeful behaviour, where material acquisitions and attributes are praised and publicised extravagantly rather than spiritual pursuits, materialism thrives. When a great deal of energy is spent on looks and appearances, and on manipulation by phone and deceptive advertisements, truth and other values are systematically eroded. In day-to-day life of increasing distractions from our real goal,  a righteous life common to all humanity becomes increasingly difficult. In spite of all problems and difficulties, there is a winning formula for living.
Right Thinking: Cognitively it involves correct understanding of realities as they unfold in day-to-day life. Concretely it involves acceptance of the entire creation as it is. Acceptance of all human beings and loving them, not necessarily liking them, for who they are is essential. Loving may lead to liking. It is very important that we do not make other persons’ problems our problems. We need to look at every one from an empathic attitude that involves looking at life from the other person’s view point. This can generate understanding and good will. We do not need to agree with the other person but we need to spend energy to understand things as he/she understands. The other person understands that we understand him/her. Sometimes we may need to let the other person know where we are. The important thing is that we have a genuine interest, and we care to understand. We are patient, transparent, and humble. While conveying our reality, we need to make sure that we respect other person  for where he or she is. We need to be willing to grant the other person the benefit of out where we are not sure while we rely on the solid data that we have when we are sure. Our effort to work toward a win-win situation for all never ceases. I am reminded of a situation in mid-1970s when I was undergoing a year of resident training in the department of Psychiatry of Louisiana State University Medical centre in New Orleans, as part of my Clinical Psychology program in the USA. A pastor with a doctorate in Pastoral Care came to my office for some emotional problem. He knew that I was a priest. From the outset he informed me that he was a homosexual and that he was not seeking help in that area. In those days homosexuality was a very controversial issue. He wanted to know what my view on homosexuality was. I told him I would like to treat him for his target problem in what was called sector therapy, and that I would tell him my view in our last session.  He remembered in the last session what I told him in our first meeting and wanted to know what I thought on homosexuality. I merely told him that I understood his sexual orientation, and that it was not my cup of tea. The important thing here is how to share our perspective without putting down the other person’s.
Right Feeling: Affectively it involves feeling any feeling without acting out. We need to feel the whole spectrum of feelings. All feelings are valid and appropriate for the situations called for. In themselves, feelings are neither good nor bad, neither correct nor incorrect. Inappropriate affect can distinguish a normal person from an abnormal person. While we feel our feelings we need to manage them and channel them in appropriate and constructive ways. Inability to control our feelings leads to disastrous consequences. Herein comes impulse control. Poor impulse control is the bane of our civilisation. civilisation is advanced by appropriate impulse control. Thus appropriate emotions can become a boon for humanity. Emotions truly are the motors that drive us to get what we want. Motors need to be guided by the steering wheel in the right direction. And that steering wheel is the reason. So we need to subject our emotions to reason. The greatest impediment that comes in the way of our growth and development is the expression of uncontrolled emotions. Uncontrolled emotions can create only enormous heat. Light for guidance can come only from reason. A mature person expresses his or her feelings appropriately with the right kind of intensity.
In sum, a truly mature and effective person is characterised by his/her correct thinking with the right modulation of feelings. This person is a lover of humanity, accepts all for who they are, is empathic, compassionate, honest, genuine, tolerant, forgiving, ready always to reconcile with others, unafraid, lives in the present, and enjoys and celebrates life with an attitude of gratitude. This is a person on the way to realisation.

Living for Others

The world famous Helen Keller once said: ”Life is an exciting business and most exciting when lived for others”. Living for others is the best form of loving others. Life without altruism is worthless. Life is interconnectedness. Life is relationship. Lower forms of life are automatically determined in that they have no choice other than to follow their own instinctual imprints. It is only humans that can think, make choices, and come up with free decisions. They can also reflect, evaluate, and even change their decisions if need be. Rational thinking is not linear as intervening emotions play a major part on decisions. Emotions are the motors that drive the decisions into practical living. Thoughts give directions to the decisions. It is not enough that we understand others. Mutual understanding happens only when others understand that we understand them. The surest way to change the world is to change ourselves. That is the only thing within our control. The best way to change others is to be a model for change or being the change we want as Gandhi said. When people do not change, they state in effect that they are satisfied or helpless with their situation. People who meddle in others’ business do not have enough things to keep themselves busy. They think they know what others need to do while they do not have a clue to their own behaviour and sense of direction.
We are social beings. We are naturally ordained to other humans. The nucleus of a family is composed of a man and a woman who in reciprocal surrendering to each other become a father and mother, and who as co-creators bring forth into this world other human beings who are trained and modelled at various stages of growth and development by teachers and spiritual guides besides parents. Loving, respecting, and accepting others are essential for loving others. We have to accept them for who they are and not as we would like them to be.  When we accept persons to be the way we like them to be, we desire them to be our own extensions, we want them to be like ourselves. Relationships are rooted in truth, trust, and justice that are bonded in love nourishing the human society. Trying to please and placate persons at the expense of truth eventually backfires. Truth is God, the only source of real energy, and at any time truth is diminished the divine element – the part of God – within us is diminished. And the quality of relationship suffers. One diminished truth or distortion of truth, seemingly harmless on the surface, leads to another, and before we realise, we all end up liars. So, extreme vigilance is needed in our conscious living lest we are swallowed up by the culture of lies, distortions, and exaggerations so prevalent everywhere. Hollywood and Bollywood with their insatiable fans, who do not have a life of their own, are modelling and marketing products so phony that even the most discerning among us fail to distinguish the phony from the genuine, and fantasy from reality. There is nothing in this world more worthwhile and purposeful than loving others and living for others, which is in reality loving ourselves and loving God.

Arriving At Truth

Many are truthful. But they do not have the passion for truth. They do not make truth their priority in life. They do not evaluate the credibility of those who transmit truth. The wisdom of Mahatma Gandhi, especially after considering his life to be a continuous experiment with truth, equating, in his later years, truth with God is very poignant. While God is object of faith, truth is an object of direct experience. Truth, freedom, and justice are the fundamental values on which all other virtues are built. Without truth there is no trust. Without trust there is no relationship. And without relationship, there is no human interaction or humanity, for that matter
“I wish you believed me”, said the most significant person in my life.  “I want you to believe me too”, said I in response in the context of some substantial disagreement related to a trivial event leading to important decisions. Truth is not believed, but experienced directly. Every truth experience is a direct experience. Truth is gotten only indirectly from believing another person’s experience of truth or perception or evaluation of what may be going on in another person. This other person may be sincere and may be telling the truth. This version of truth is filtered through one’s experiences, and, therefore, very subjective. This person’s truth may be coloured by needs at the time and motivation that is often unconscious.  I have seen persons swearing that they were right or did not misplace something to find out later that they were wrong or did misplace. Our mind does play tricks. That is why psychologists are very concerned about one’s motivation and quality of training in observation. Many significant events in life are directed by unconscious motivation. Psychoanalysis or psychodynamic psychotherapy, hypno-analysis or hypnotherapy, and narco-analysis are powerful tools to uncover the hidden but the truth-revealing unconscious. Of course, to engage in these procedures arduous professional training and strict ethical code need to be in place. Informed consent of the person participating in any of these procedures is essential for protecting human rights. Any of these procedures is interactive and consensual, and hence to be initiated by the client for one’s healing and growth. As what is revealed through these procedures cannot be always hundred percent right, corroboration and confirmation by the client from whom the revelation comes is of paramount importance. The court-ordered or coercive narco-analysis or the administration of “truth serum” (administration of psychoactive medications to obtain information from those unable or unwilling to provide it)  and the much publicised polygraph (“lie detector tests”) to a party to establish the veracity of an event, for instance, is unethical and, hence, should be prohibited  internationally.
We generally believe that our closest relative or best friend to be telling the truth. But their mind may be tricked to believe they are telling the truth while they are not. They themselves may not be aware of their own, often unwitting, hidden agenda, unconscious motives, and biases and prejudices. Hence they may not be morally responsible for their truth that may turn out to be untruths in reality. Can anyone then have absolute truth? The answer is a simple and straight forward  ‘no’. Does that mean that we cannot arrive at truth? The answer again is ‘no’. Strict criteria, rigorous observation, consistency in approach, one standard for all, freedom from biases and prejudices, and detachment from desired outcome or results are absolutely necessary for someone who searches after truth. One should be extremely careful about loaded  or leading questions in eliciting information.  Examples of leading questions are:  “It is delicious food, isn’t it? Don’t you know this is hundred percent genuine? From these questions, the answers expected are clear. The questioner expects the respondent to agree. These questions in reality are pseudo-questions that already contain the direction of answers. Truly, one’s credibility is at issue in believing certain type of things. In a particular situation your closest relative may be less credible than a person less acquainted with  on account of lack of accurate observation, consistency, internal coherence, reliability, and validity. Truth can  be distorted or embellished. What is required is truth and nothing but the truth. If one direct observation of a close person is found to be inaccurate in an emotional situation, other observations of that person can become suspect in similar emotional settings. From my observations and clinical experiences in the USA and India, I have seen relationships break down again and again because one does not give credence to reports from a close one, and stay, on the contrary, strongly with one’s own perception and, above all, conscience. The aggrieved close party feels disbelieved, and that leads to break-down. If an agreeable disagreement can be embraced in good faith in many controversial and disagreeing perceptions, most of the problems can be dissolved, and break-downs  avoided. The world certainly is going to be a better place with so much more energy and good will. In other words, accepting the other person to have as much integrity as I have, while according generous benefit of doubt can go a long way in promoting harmony and unity of humanity. There will be real truth, and not just travesty of truth which is worse than no truth. Sometimes the best we have is not truth but some fragments of truth, and plenty of disagreements coming from incompatible perceptions. But then this is often the stuff of life from which beautiful patterns and designs can be woven for a rich tapestry of life. Certainly we can celebrate bliss, no matter what. Let the dead preoccupied with the past bury the dead while we engage a gorgeous present life full of future promises. Because we thrive in the present our future is secured. We need to have passion to arrive at truth at any cost.

Equanimity

Equanimity refers to a balanced mind in adverse circumstances. It is easy to be calm and poised when things are fine and dandy. But it is very difficult to maintain composure and an evenness of mind under strain and stress. It is certainly a virtue in short supply. But it is a goal well worth striving for as serenity and peace of mind depends on that. In Indian philosophical and religious thinking, equanimity is not just a state of mind but truly describes our true, detached, and undisturbed nature which is gradually revealed and made aware through spiritual practice (sadhana), and thus it becomes a pre-requisite for self-realisation. In Patanjali Yoga Sutras, equanimity (upeksha) is considered to be one of the four sublime mental attitudes along with loving kindness (maitri), compassion (karuna), and joy (mudita).  In Buddhism, equanimity is the steady consciousness of everything impermanent in this world. A mind filled with equanimity is exalted and flourishing; it is without hostility and ill-will. Actually we are all called to be in a continuous, conscious state of equanimity – a peace that comes from continuous surrendering to what is at any given point, and acceptance of what comes in our way while engaged in doing our very best to make our life meaningful and purposeful.
In these columns I have written a couple of weeks ago a piece on tough love. It related to a close friend of mine with whom I had some initial arrangements in connection with some properties. In the midst of on-going negotiations he got what he wanted from me due to my deep trust in him, and quickly created legal documents on the basis of our verbal exchanges while I was in good faith negotiating with him to come to final agreements that would also produce legal documents for me. From what transpired  I realised I had been duped as he had no plan to honour his verbal promises. In retrospection I realise that he was stalling with verbal assurances. Not only did he block my phone calls but also slapped me with some spurious law-suits. He knew too well how averse I was to law-suits and spending time money and energy with lawyers and courts. Even though I pleaded my own case (pro se) in the court and asked the judge to make his own judgment from the facts presented, the law-suit went nowhere. The only comic relief in the court came from none other than myself, an old-man, a swami-priest with a long walking stick and wearing saffron lungi (wrap-around) and a  modified loose kurta (Indian shirt) with a specially knitted cap in the midst of a spectacle of lawyers donning flowing black robes of colonial times while speaking Manglish (Malayalamised English) that they alone could understand. My friend turned plaintiff also evaded out of court settlement suggested by the judge and his own lawyer and heartily endorsed by me. After my realising that I became a victim of betrayal of trust, things came to a head in the office of a circle inspector (head of several police stations) in front of whom I put a question to my friend related to his promises. His unscrupulous denial and lying through his teeth to my face clinched the issue for me. The financial loss was enormous. The emotional loss of friendship was devastating. There and then I decided to cut my losses and move on considering my path marked out for my mission in life. Of course everyone has to make his or her decision on the basis of emotional and financial cost-benefit analysis.  I made my decision calculated not to let the case touch my being and soul. Equanimity is about not letting unfortunate events managing us and guiding our spirit.
Equanimity is not stark detachment or cool neutrality.  It is really a state of balancing between indescribable experiences at the peak of the mountain and unfathomable anguish in the valley of sorrow. It is the bed-rock foundation from which we launch into the art of living and loving. It is necessary for moral and spiritual development. A life that is bitter is lost; and a life that nurses injuries and betrayals is stuck in the mud; and a mind that keeps scores of what could have been and should have been is spinning its wheels going nowhere. Equanimity is the cherished and precious possession that everyone can have and no one can take away. It requires taking care of toxic and cancerous relationships and friendships. Sad news and betrayals will keep on coming. A life lived in trust, hope, and love alone, in spite of all perils, will determine who we are. Equanimity will, according to situations, anchor us, steady us, and steer us on our chosen course in calmness.

Nature Mysticism

In the beginning was the world. The world and all in it were good.  In due time, humans appeared in the world. Only humans have freedom and awareness. As humans we are aware that we are aware. Humans were intrigued by nature and its various elements and forces. Our early ancestors developed a mystic relationship with nature. That mystic relationship is what is called nature mysticism here. This relationship is pure, natural, and spontaneous; and we are all called to mysticism. This relationship suffered markedly as humans gradually got alienated from nature with the development of city living. With the decline of truth and righteousness over thousands of years, our civilisation currently got hijacked by material wealth, power, and control. It must be pointed out on the positive side, though, that consciousness of human rights and democratic principles has expanded over the years. In that sense humans have advanced. Other enslavements such as personality cults, poverty in the midst of plenty, exploitation of nature and its resources are rampant.  It is of paramount importance for our civilisation to regain its purpose and direction. The nature mysticism can only be healed and restored as humans return to nature, and re-engage nature. As humans lived in and actively engaged nature, they conceived forces in nature that were above and beyond them. These were gods for them. Finally they brought together all these forces in a monotheistic conception and conceived a Super-force called God. The gradual evolution of the concept of God, say in the Old Testament of the Bible, is fascinating. All the literature found in the Old Testament, Vedas, and the Vedanthas (Upanishads and Bhagavad Gita) are gotten from Nature Mysticism.
In nature mysticism we created our own gods or God who did what we expected of them. These gods or Super-God punished, rewarded, or graced us according to our deeds or according to God’s will or wish. When our prayers were not granted, God was not nice to us. We know God as unknowable or indefinable. Yet we went about our life as if we knew this God by defining God, and giving to this God benign qualities and attributes. We have not been trained to take things as they come, to surrender ourselves gracefully to the inevitable, to accept things that we cannot change, and to accept what we are given by destiny or permitted by God when we do not get what we prayed for. We still do not have the wisdom to realise that what we get could be a blessing in disguise and thus better than what we want and desire at that point. Far-Eastern, Semitic (Jewish) mono-theistic conception and evolution of God led to Christianity and Islam. Hinduism has Rama or Krishna as God. Valmiki wrote Ramayana, the story of Rama, who is none other than Krishna in another avatar (incarnation). Ved Vyasan created Krishna in Mahabharata, who guided the righteous in the war with the unrighteous. The Bhagavad Gita, contained in Mahabharata, is the teaching of Krishna as well as the essence of Hinduism. Were it not for Vyasan and the great systematiser, Sankara, there would not be any Hinduism as it is today. According to Christianity, Christ as the Anointed of God existed from the beginning as the Word (Logos). The Word became flesh as the historical Jesus who, in spite of being innocent, was crucified by this wicked world, but rose from death by his power over life and death as the victorious Christ who overcame this world, and said to those who believed in him: “Live in my words, you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free”. The Sanatan Dharma (The Eternal Righteousness) culled by Indian sages from the best of nature mysticism and proclaimed by Hinduism as a way of life says: “Satyam vada (Speak the truth); Dharmam chara (Walk the righteous path)”. In a world where truth and righteousness have become casualties of greed, materialism, and consumerism, and where even many religious leaders have succumbed to the demonic powers of this world, we know we have the Kingdom of God – a kingdom of truth and righteousness, a kingdom of reconciliation and compassion – within us. Whether we believe in God or not, we have always with us what we need: the nature mysticism connecting us with the ground of our being and beyond.

Freedom And Conscience

Freedom is the most distinguishing characteristic that differentiates a human from an animal. Only in freedom a person can make decisions to become who one needs to become. That is why there were persons who preferred freedom to death. A life without freedom is not worth living. A duly formed conscience on the basis of a universal ethical and value system steers the human in the right direction to achieve one’s destiny. Conscience, a human’s ultimate guide, can work fully only in the climate of full freedom. Thus freedom and conscience are inseparably intertwined.
The question now is: How free is any human being? It is easy to detect encroachments on freedom by self-centred, anti-social perpetrators of crimes, authoritarian dictators, or do-gooder autocrats. It is very difficult to with-stand extremely subtle pressures on freedom from one’s close friends and relatives, and even one’s spouse. It is often the close ones that nibble away your freedom. You can become very vulnerable to their repeated attempts of manipulations of their friendship and love for you. You become very susceptible to their intriguing and irrational demands, especially when they with-hold satisfactions or emotional and physical pleasures that are in their power to give,  and that we very much crave for. They try to make you feel guilty by comparing your love for them with your fairness for a casual acquaintance, co-worker, or an employee whom they dislike or despise, certainly not any rational basis. In effect what they say is: “If you really loved me, you would have the same feelings toward them that I have for them”. Here reason does not matter; raw emotions do. You may even be considered to be a mad person. For instance, I remember years ago when I bought a piece of property that I liked at a relatively low price on the southern tip of cape, Kanyakumari, a close relative of mine thought I was really mad since the property was in another state far away from my actual residence. Now the value of that property on the ocean beach at sun-set point has sky-rocketed, I am a very wise man indeed with a plan and vision. It is good to remind ourselves that these very close persons are extremely well-intentioned, even though misguided. They are very devoted to our welfare, and intensely committed to loving us and taking care of us. They really want to save us from ourselves!
In a difficult, doggy dog world of stress and tension, and struggle for survival, the sheer prospect of loneliness can make one succumb to subtle pressures that curtail one’s freedom and compromise one’s conscience. My suggestion to all is: Do not compromise with your true freedom; do not compromise with your carefully inculcated value system; do not compromise with your conscience, however you are tempted to do it for immediate gain and satisfaction. Make only those compromises that you can live with in mental and spiritual peace. Hitler may not have become the monster he did become, if persons in power in Europe, including the prime minster of Britain, Neville Chambelain, had not, in weakness, compromised and appeased Hitler as he kept on annexing adjoining countries. Stick to your long-cherished principles, no matter what they cost. Your peace of mind is worth your bliss in good times and bad times.

Universal Human

Humans are born into this universe, not into any nations. We humans arbitrarily carved this earth into nations through occupation, invasion, colonisation, or elections. New nations can arise as for instance, Pakistan and Bangladesh emerged from the Greater India. A national entity can disappear through dissolution into various nations as in the case of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics or Soviet Union. A human, especially a person in power, anywhere in the world can be tried for crimes against humanity or blatant violations of human rights in an International Court. All humans need to primarily belong to the United Nations that need long overdue substantive reform, and then secondarily to nation states or territorial divisions for the sake of convenient and effective governance. Loyalty to humanity needs to come before loyalty to particular nations or patriotism. We are all truly citizens of this earth first, and each one of us is accountable to humanity for our life and behaviour. Our collective human will guided by truth, justice, equality, and freedom needs to prevail at all times.
It is in the context of all humans equally belonging to the one beloved earth that we all share and need to ecologically preserve that I want to reflect on the signs of a universal human very aptly on the birthday (October 2) of one of the greatest humans of this earth: Mahatma Gandhi. Gandhi is a great modern universal human model in that he belonged to the whole world even though he was an Indian national. He embodied the best human values embracing all. While Gandhi provided non-violent leadership in freeing Greater India from the chains of British colonialism he was led by larger universal human interests and principles that excluded no one including the British. For instance, in his vision, he was very clear that the colonial British rule in India was morally and politically very detrimental to the rulers as well as the ruled. So much so he equated non-violence with love. Unfortunately many evil things in the past have happened, and still happen, on account of human beings engaging and indulging in depraved selfishness. Fortunately some evils, if not all, are addressed and remedied very slowly but surely and persistently in international forums.
In the evolving consciousness of human rights on the path of the necessary goal of the unity of humanity, nothing is more important than the formation of a universal human. Here then are some of the important elements that go into the formation. The universal human possesses a conscience formed on the basis of what is right and wrong, truth and falsehood. Freedom, justice, fairness and equality of all humans are also necessary aspects of this formation. The Judeo-Christian values such as the Ten Commandments are found in all religions in some form or other. These values and other universal maxims such as ‘do good and avoid evil’, ‘give everyone one’s due’, and ‘do to others what you like others to do to you’ enter into a thorough and fully formed conscience. Non-violent resolution of conflicts with love and compassion, tolerance and respect, gentleness and generosity is a must. Guided by this rigorous and firm conscience, the universal human does everything while enjoying and celebrating life. Doing always what is right with due discernment has its own reward and satisfaction.  When mistakes are made, they are duly acknowledged and corrected in humility. Everybody grows and blossoms in an atmosphere of thoughtfulness and diversity.  Nobody is given preferential treatment on the basis of birth or wealth. Everyone is chosen on the basis of abilities, interests, and merits to do the right job that receives an adequate living wage, and enables all to live in human dignity.

Cosmic Spirituality

Spirituality is who we are and what we are all about. Our body is our facility to serve our spirit, where spirituality happens. Its sole purpose is to serve our spirit, our consciousness, and our immortal soul. In the modern age things got turned around. The body that is supposed to be the means has become an end in itself. The triumph of materialism made possible the cultivation and worship of the body at the expense of the spirit. Industrialisation and technological advances have contributed to undreamt material prosperity. Modernisation and westernisation go hand in hand. The West and the Eastern countries such as Japan, Taiwan, South Korea, and Singapore that imitate especially the United States have become models of prosperity for the East. The run-away affluence marked by enormous waste has created a throw-away society where persons gorged with fattening food have become over-weight and obese, and cannot be accommodated by ever-changing closet-full of clothes and ward-robes. Any more what matter are looks and body shapes.
Character and perennial values are out of the window. Three predominant things, for instance, that preoccupy the minds of waking persons, especially in the United States, are how to reduce weight, how to seduce or conquer a boy-friend or girl-friend, even if it be for a one night stand, and weather. At least most of the conversation heard about relates to these three topics. Tolerance for pain is becoming less and less as each day passes by. Every house-hold is a veritable poly-pharmacy with quick remedies for every sneeze and sniffle, ache and pain, stress and constipation. Erectile dysfunction has become a household phrase. The most frequently used words even in minor conflicts relate to bodily and sexual functions. Self-control and self-discipline are taboo words for a permissive and promiscuous society. In a drug-culture that looks for instant euphoria and fix from boredom and emptiness, religion has lost its traditional, salutary, benign hold on people. Religion losing its moorings as well as its substance became unprincipled, and, lagging in leadership, got mired in defensive posturings. Instead of being champions of the spirit leading the way by broad, enlightened policies and sound spiritual guidelines geared to establish the Kingdom of God, they failed to guide and bring societies ashore from a constantly buffeted, storm-tossed, turbulent ocean. In this background of the general decline of culture and civilisation that I would like to present a few thoughts and some important signs of what is called Cosmic or Universal Spirituality needed at this critical point when humanity is at the cross-roads looking for dire need of direction to take the right road:
• Cosmic Spirituality is the spirituality that everyone is born into.
• This spirituality is common to all humans as they are created in the image of God, and destined to join God as the final goal.
• It goes beyond religions. While religions have exercised some benign control on the wild impulses of their members, they have not succeeded in moving humanity beyond a point. They have become anti-signs as they fight among themselves, and as they do not have a common minimum program for humanity wherein they can constructively cooperate.    Humanity currently does not look to religions and their leaders for creative solutions to humanity’s pressing concerns and problems.
• As God communicates God’s Self fully and adequately in various modes and manifestations of nature, this spirituality is automatically imprinted in every human at the time of birth.
• A sublime order of nature (Prakriti Dharma) manifests for the whole humanity this unique spirituality.
• The Eternal Righteousness (Sanatan Dharma) as a way of life is another way of describing this spirituality.
• This spirituality believes in one God, one religion, one race or caste, and one class.
• It does not characteris any kind of discriminations on the basis of colour, caste, creed, gender, and ethnic origin.
• It believes in the brother/sisterhood of humans and the oneness of humanity.
• It considers God to be the Truth that sets everyone free.
• It defines God to be the Love that administers justice with compassion.
• It sees everyone as unique and equal.
• It respects human rights and everyone’s dignity.
• It thrives in harmony with nature, and in forgiveness and reconciliation among humans.
• It takes from nature only what it needs.
• This spirituality is guided by one’s conscience that distinguishes right from wrong, true from false, and good from evil.
In Cosmic Spirituality everybody finds his/her bliss while concerned about the well-being of the entire humanity.

Market Spirituality

Market or consumer spirituality is like anything else is a commodity of the market economy and consumer society. Coming out of the civil rights and protests movements of the 60’s and the 70’s, and the new generations of the 80’s and the 90’s, quite a few genuine seekers in the USA got disillusioned by the wants and pockets of poverty in the midst of plenty, and their own emptiness in the midst of so-called plenitude, consumerist values, waste, and traditional religions devoid of true spirituality and freedom. They saw Christ’s teachings got domesticated and rendered innocuous by the unbridled capitalism and consumerism. They also saw a televangelism tailored to suit capitalism. Some of the prominent televangelists turned out to be hypocrites who fell from the star-studded skies while building their own cozy paradises and empires. It is also important to note that some jet-set evangelists are exporting their own brands of Christianity and capitalistic culture to the rest of the world. The US economy with its voracious appetite, dominating the world, also swallows up everything in its path.
Some of the disillusioned seekers from the US, turned off by their religions and an economy   dominated by multi-national corporations, and, above all, a political system highly influenced by powerful lobbies of special interest groups, looked toward East and came especially to India searching for their answers to life’s purpose. Somehow they ended up in ashrams of spiritual gurus and god-men/women. Thus the remedy soon became malady.  At this point the most charitable thing that may be said is that they get in India some placebo, sufficiently soothing, that they are not getting back in their own homeland. Many of these gurus and godmen/women come in the way of genuine seekers (sadhaks) in that they conveniently make themselves to be the destination instead of taking the seekers beyond them to the ultimate destination. Some of these seekers get their own egos massaged as they end up also as handlers and packagers of these godmen/women for the consumer society back at home.  Another reality that needs to be kept in mind is that initially the searchers coming to India are surprised at the number of people from India who are eager to come to the US looking for the good life. Well, the Indians are not any different from the rest of the world in looking for greener pastures for their physical well-being.
The run-away capitalism that makes objects of subjects (humans) is as bad as authoritarian communism. Both manipulate humans through a convenient ethic of opportunism to achieve their materialistic ends. While the authoritarian communism is oppressive, the unbridled capitalism gives an illusion of freedom. Both use force and fear, power and control in varying degrees. We still need to develop a model between these two extreme systems, that will tame our “predatory self-interest” as Reinhold Niebuhr, a social theologian calls it, and harness our authentic social energy within us for the common good of all humanity. It is of paramount importance that our spirituality does not become a prey to market economy. And that we develop a universal spirituality that embraces the entire humankind. This spirituality incorporates the best from the world’s best spiritual masters as our spiritual heritage. In this spirituality, that goes beyond all religions, and that respects individual beliefs, one can find one’s bliss.

Empathic Relating

Empathic relating comes from empathic living. Empathy means putting oneself in the other person’s place in every way possible: in thought, feeling, disposition, attitude, pain, and joy. A few years ago when our Siddhashram was being constructed in Munnar there were many  persons from different castes working in close cooperation. They were generally cordial. I was not personally aware of each one’s caste. One day Rekha (not her real name), one of the workers, came to me crying. She stated one of the carpenters close to her work area, Rajan (not his real name), cited an old proverb hurt that her as it put her caste in a bad light. He cited the proverb in answer to a question regarding his availability or predictability in the next 24 hours. He would only know his situation for sure only after day-break next morning. When I confronted Rajan with the derogatory proverb, his answer was that he did not mean to hurt anyone, and Rekha should not feel hurt as it is after all a commonly used proverb in the culture. To conscientise him, I asked him if he would like the proverb if he were in the place of Rekha. Then he got the clear message. It is high time that we clean our language of any proverb or saying that put any race, caste, sex, or religion in a prejudiced light.
In empathic living as well as in empathic relating one undergoes what the other person undergoes short of doing what the other person does. For instance, empathy does not mean that I cry with the other person while I am in empathy with the pain of the other person. That might be construed as over-identification or over-involvement that is not really helpful to the other person. But an empathic person will do whatever can be done under the circumstances. Sometimes the only thing an empathic person needs to do is to listen to another person attentively so the other person can vent one’s feelings and obtain release from the grip of oppressive pain and hurt. Empathic listening with undivided attention in an understanding and accepting climate without evaluating and judging the other person is a precious gift that we can give to another person. This gift can temporarily or permanently help free the other person from the emotional block that one is stuck in. Actress Jiah Khan in despair was driven to suicide a couple of days ago most probably because she perceived the world as a hostile place. Perhaps she felt that she would not be able to trust anyone, and receive the empathic understanding she was looking for.  Empathic relating certainly is a necessary ingredient in a helping and healing relationship such as psychotherapy. We need not agree with a person’s interpretation of things, but we can certainly empathize with a person, which (empathizing) might help one look at one’s interpretation in a new or different light that is helpful. We also need to keep in mind that when many persons say that we do not understand them they mean we do not agree with them. Clearly understanding is not agreeing. In any case, empathic relating enhances our own personality. It is essential for Unity of Humanity.

The World as I See

I have been continuously reflecting on my life trying to figure out the essentials of life. When I left home and my native land at the age of 17 to join the Jesuits, I thought my life was safe and secure. In my mind I received through the Jesuits the best religious and secular training and education that the world could offer. I also thought that after many years of extensive and intensive training and formation I received the best job that the Jesuits could give, that is training selected men (young Jesuits and others) in Jnana Deep Vidyapeeth (Institute of Philosphy and Religion), Pune, India, who would devote their lives to spread the teaching and good news of Christ to establish the Kingdom of God. As I progressed I became restless and I realised that the serious questions that were cropping up in my mind did not have satisfactory answers. I gradually began to develop difficulty in reconciling myself theologically and spiritually with the great importance given to chastity/celibacy and unconditional obedience to the pope, and the medieval, hierarchical, autocratic power structure in the Catholic Church. I became aware that that kind of curtailing of freedom of individuals was unnecessary and even harmful for spiritual life. I left the Jesuits at the age of 42, keeping with me the very best they gave, to continue my search for truth and answers to questions related to purpose of life in this world.
Where am I now at the age of 73? How do I see this world? This world is a beautiful place created for all. Every human is created in God’s image. I respect and revere every human. This beautiful world has taken a wrong turn that led to the strangle-hold of consumerism, greed, exhibitionism, vain glory, and domination by a select, powerful, and privileged but misguided few. A world of solid values and virtues seems to be in the grip of demonic forces. These demons, no doubt, are within us. We can exorcise them if we dare to. Unfortunately we humans as co-creators have failed. Religions have so far failed to deliver their promises. However, finally truth will triumph. Light will not be overcome by darkness. The teachings of Christ and Buddha, and the message given in the person of Sri Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita, and the life of truth and non-violence modelled by Mahatma Gandhi in his practical life are eternal, and will provide guidance for all. There are other seers and luminaries illuminating our path. No doctrine or dogma can satisfy. Finally it is a question of faith in God or the person who reveals God. Even here any scripture or any divine being can be only a pointer to the Ultimate. But one thing we can be sure of. Love of God can happen only through love of humanity. God can be worshiped only in spirit, truth, and love. No one who loves his or her fellow human being, including the least one, will be lost. It is only difficult because of the bad programming we have received during our formative years, and because of the garbage we have collected in our mind over the years, and the baggage we carry that slows us down.

Rajayogic Meditation for Relationships

This raja-yogic pranayamic (rajayoga = royal union; pranayama = extension of breath or life force) meditation fosters union or relationships among individual beings. The meditation having a horizontal dimension also has the four stages of 1.relaxation, 2. purification, 3. surrendering, and 4. union. Holy Scriptures very strongly warn that it is impossible to love God who is invisible without loving humans who are visible in our day to day life. Service of God is done only through service of humanity. We need to love even those we dislike, even our enemies.
The first two stages of relaxation and purification during rhythmic breathing are the same as in the previous meditation for developing union between oneself and the Supreme Being. In the third stage the surrendering is to the divine aspect in every person. This surrendering and letting go to the divine in each person facilitates the unity of humanity, marks our human solidarity, and highlights our common destiny, no matter how different we are.
Stage 4: Union
While on-going breathing in and out in the context of relaxation, purification, and surrendering we can visualise vividly all the persons in the world with whom we have relationship problems slowly and one at a time. These persons are our relationship targets. Then we need to make in our imagination packages of our subtle psycho-spiritual-social energies, and direct these energy packages to the targets. Experience these packages moving in terms of powerful vibrations of peace and love. While some are ready and disposed to receive your vibrations, others are not. From those who are not yet ready to receive the vibrations of peace and love you sent, your vibrations will return to you. You do not like it. You are not in this universe to react out of your frustrations but to respond out of your endless love. You do not allow to be conditioned by them. So keep on sending your vibrations regardless.  You are not in this universe for the results you want. You are here to surrender to the Divine who alone knows what is best for all.
Those who are ready for the encounter will receive your vibrations whole-heartedly. See your vibrations enveloping and embracing them. Your vibrations in turn generate reciprocal vibrations in them so that they can surrender to all that is best – the divine – in you. Here your vibrations are in phase with theirs. Experience communion, communication, and transformation taking place in the selfless, non-exploitative surrendering and merging with each one’s pure and egoless being.  Here there is no settling of scores, no justifications, no  pompousness, and  no claims. Here there are only two sparks of divine consciousness that engage each other in gratitude, compassion, and love to make this world a better place for all.
With those you want to develop a relationship with, bombard them with your vibrations of peace and love. When they are ready, they will respond. Meanwhile be aware that only unconditional acceptance and selfless and compassionate love for all can generate effortless and non-ending bliss and pure joy.

Yogic Meditation for perfection

Raja yoga means royal union; pranayama means extension of breath or life force. This rajayogic-pranayamic meditation for developing union with one’s self and the Supreme Being having a vertical dimension has four stages of relaxation, purification, surrendering, and union.
• Relaxation. Calmness, peacefulness, and relaxation are necessary for growth and development. Nothing can grow in a climate of disturbance, tension, and stress. The best way to relax is to regulate our breathing in a setting where external and internal stimulations are controlled. Often we do not have situations of our choice where we can control the external stimulations. In such settings we can control the stimulations by not controlling them or actively accepting those stimulations that we cannot eliminate. We can maximise elimination of internal stimulations by carefully chosen postures. To begin the meditation,  sit comfortably in sukhasana (easy posture) or siddhasana or padmasana or on a chair with a straight back support. Direct the eyes down towards the floor.  Close them letting the upper eye-lid gently sliding over the lower one.  This will help quieten the brain and minimise external stimulation. Similarly gently close the lips. You must be sitting in a comfortable pose without undue stress or tension with your head and spinal cord straight. Keeping the spinal cord erect helps one to be alert. One does not want to go to sleep. Breathe in and out in a slow, continuous flow without stops and jerks. Let smooth, deep inhalation and complete exhalation go on and on throughout this exercise. Think of lungs as two good balloons getting slowly and completely inflated and deflated with air. Fresh air with plenty of oxygen carried by blood vessels into every cell comes in during inhalation; used-up air that contains carbon-dioxide exits from the lungs. Be aware of any aversive stimulus such as unwanted noise in the environment. Acknowledge such stimulus and let it be. Take a brief systematic survey of your body going slowly from one part of the body to another. Be aware of any itching, twitching, tightness, throbbing, tension, and stress. Acknowledge any uncomfortable sensation, and let it be to be worked on later. During the process of rhythmic inhalation and exhalation, be aware of the deep relaxation that is taking place. Experience waves and waves of relaxation enveloping and enwrapping, carrying and floating you in enjoyable, deep relaxation. You can also imagine to be in a beautiful, scenic view of your choice.
• Purification.  During inhalation think of every cell and fiber of your being refreshed, strengthened, and cleansed by oxygen carried by your blood streams. Likewise carbon-dioxide and other impurities in your blood are exhaled out of your system. During this special awareness of breathing in and breathing out, the process of on-going purification taking place. We need to add mental healing and hygiene to the bodily cleansing. During inhalation everything that is desirable such as truth, justice, fairness, goodness, beauty, compassion, kindness, and awareness, or any other value is breathed in. During exhalation everything that is undesirable  – lust and desire (kama), anger and hatred (krodha), greed and miserliness (lobha), delusion and attachment (moha), ego and pride (mada or ahankar), envy and jealousy (maatsarya) – are breathed out.  This is a very relentless, dynamic, and life-long process.
• Surrendering: During inhalation one breathes in cosmic consciousness, vital energy, and fullness of spirit-life. During exhalation one surrenders completely to the Supreme Being, and puts oneself at the disposal of that Divine Spirit to be molded and shaped as a lump of clay is worked on by a potter.  We are works in progress. Our complete surrendering makes sure that we do not put any obstacle in the way of our becoming and being who we need to be.
• Union and Communion: Here the stage is set in our innermost being for the all important and climatic union of the individual consciousness with the Universal Consciousness. We are minute sparks that are parts of the One Blazing Cosmic Spark. Here the mutuality of communication is going on even as the yogic-pranayamic meditation is going on. For a person who has been through years of sadhana (asceticism), the jeevatma (individual soul) in this ecstatic union with the parmatma (Supreme Soul) is in communion beyond communication. Here only what matters is that the individual spirit wills what the Supreme Spirit wills.

Love Your Enemies

In the serene Shantisadan Siddhashram (Abode of Peace centre for realisation) where I live, generally peace reigns. Seven paid helpers of the ashram appeared to work cooperatively and harmoniously for years. However, some recent events that had their origin when I was away marred the ashram atmosphere. One of the workers quit after getting another job. After about 10 days a police officer arrived at the ashram door to inquire about a complaint against an important ashram member. The complaint resulted from a false accusation. Soon the ashram atmosphere became saturated with vicious toxicity. I was also reminded of the false accusation years ago in the USA that could have dragged my name in the dirt. At that time I was a very responsible and prominent psychologist doctor on the staff of a children’s psychiatric hospital. As I was not arrested after the complaint and inquiry, I asked the police detective why I was not arrested, his spontaneous but simple response was that he did not believe the story of the complainant.
The question really is how to forgive the unforgivable. How does one forgive those who out of some kind of vindictiveness attempt to ruin others’ reputation or assassinate their characters? In short, how does one love one’s enemies? This was the question put to me in last night’s satsang (gathering of saints) in the ashram.  In a world of the law of talion (“an eye for an eye”), forgiveness is not in vogue. I tried to look into the teachings of the World’s Best Masters. The truly satisfying spiritual answer that came to me was from the teaching of Christ. “But I say to you that hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you” (Luke 6: 27-28).  Sri Krishna in the Bhagavad  Gita also  exhorts us who are on the path of liberation to go beyond hatred and revenge. Because those who hurt us are not different from us. They are really us. When Christ tells us to love our enemies, I do not interpret it to mean that we like them. Liking comes from our feelings. Loving is a commitment that comes from our will. That kind of loving is in our control while liking is not. So we can love someone we dislike. Eventually we get consciously into the habit of loving everyone.
Loving everyone also paves the way to the unity of humanity that is so necessary in a world of fragmentation and divisiveness. Moreover, we do not make others’ problems our problems. The energy we spend in hating others will eventually destroy us as we do not have that energy for our own development. Thus not hating or taking revenge is in our own enlightened self-interest in the long run. I do not by any means suggest that we suppress or repress our legitimate emotions coming out of our hurts, that can harm us. We definitely need to vent those feelings in appropriate settings to be emotionally healthy.

Effective Communication

Good communication gains, bad communication loses. Marshall McLuhan, a great philosopher of communication theory, considers any communication as an extension of oneself. For him the medium is the message.  The focus needs to be on the medium rather than the message. In my over 45 years of counselling, psychotherapy, mediation and conflict management, I have experienced it is not what I said but how I said that had the most desired effect. It is not really the content of communication but the process of communication that really mattered. The process of communication relates to one’s non-verbal language such as body-language, tone, pace, emotional intensity, and a healthy detachment. Body language may involve facial expression, posture, and general demeanour.
A loud and trained strong voice of mine was an advantage for me in my younger days, especially in public speaking when a  loudspeaker was rare. Now my strong, loud voice is a disadvantage. When I talk in my natural, loud voice my wife and others sometimes ask me if I am angry when I am certainly not angry. I was certainly intensely involved and passionate in advocating for my cause.  There are times when in the midst of our communication my wife tells me that I am putting her down, and why am I yelling. As I do not like to put anybody    down or yell at anyone, and as I in my hurt challenge her to tell me what it is that I said that made her feel put down, her invariable response is: “It is the way you said it”. She is definitely talking about some intangible medium or often inscrutable expression that, for me anyway,  does not easily lend to any kind of rational analysis.
I wanted to find out how Mahatma Gandhi was so effective in his communication with the British. I listened to a rare specimen of his recorded speech. I watched several times  Attenborough’s precious Oscar winning movie “Gandhi “ wherein Oscar-winning Ben Kingsley acted beautifully as Gandhi. In his conversation or talk Gandhi spoke in a dispassionate way. His tone was low; his pace was slow. He was certainly engaging. He did not lack in conviction. He certainly was not an orator. His speech almost said let the truth of his cause stand. He was resigned to whatever happening. He was not there to score a point or win an argument or make a particular impression. He was plain in his un-adorned speech as he was unshakable in his resolve. His communication coming from his un-daunted spirit and his strength continuously fed by his spiritual source prepared him to be the one-man army on the border of then East Pakistan while millions of persons, both Hindus and Muslims, were slaughtered on the western border.  Shall we then pay more attention to how we say what we say? Many times the way we communicate with empathy makes the difference between winning and losing.

Truth and Integrity

Truth and integrity are tossed into the ocean of corruption, avarice, revenge and false accusations on a daily basis. Reports of violence and crimes abound in media reports. Fortunately, most racist, casteist, colonial, imperial, and autocratic structures that have maintained a so-called well-behaved life and world order by brutal external force have physically crumbled. But these structures of discrimination and prejudice are still well-entrenched by and large in the hearts and minds of persons. Physical structures that need to usher in a new order, and that respect human rights are enshrined in beautiful volumes of legislated laws but have not been enforced, say, in India. Religions that at one time used to be custodians of moral integrity and values are losing their credibility and moral bite. This is a transitional stage where struggles are being waged among anarchy, vested, regional, and group interests for domination. As long as a broad spectrum of values, rights and interests of an all-inclusive humanity is not secured and safe-guarded, our moral and spiritual progress will be at great risk. Therefore a new sense of urgency and higher level of consciousness and awareness are of paramount importance. This can come only from a fine conscience formed on the basis of a spirituality beyond religions and a universal truth energy that respects everyone’s rights.
I have experienced prejudices and discriminations in my many years of life and work in the “land of the free and the brave” (USA).  I returned to India a few years ago to continue my ministry of unity of humanity and universal brotherhood and sisterhood with a new vigour in my setting stage of life. I did not anymore have to look for my livelihood as I provided for my simple requirements. So I plunged whole-heartedly into my ministry saying to myself: “I have nothing to lose, everything to gain.”
But ever since I arrived, I have been swimming upstream against raging currents. The powerful, sinister forces in a parish I live viciously attacked and defamed me and my wife and damaged my property, and that too led by a misguided parish priest, for up-holding the values that East West Awakening stands for. My relatives mostly abandoned me for not catering to their financial wants as I used to in the past when I was working in the United States. Politicians and their parties and unions do not care as I do not make financial contributions or as I do not go along with their plans. I buy lumbers even as trees are rotting in my property as I do not provide bribes to respective officers. My trust has been severely betrayed by some relatives and a close friend causing huge financial loss. I did not have much luck with the law enforcement department. I am pleading my own case filed against me by the one who betrayed my trust on account of his own insatiable greed. A magazine called Osanna clamoring for reform has an article on me without mentioning my name and depicting me as a fraud and a time-tomb. That means the so-called reformers also can be corrupt!
Even as I am writing this, we are facing a vicious false accusation against a trusted Ashram member from a former employee.  My older brother living a quiet life had, calling my pet name, warned me: “What you are telling is true and right, but you are not going to go anywhere if you do not toe the line of those who are in authority and have power even though they are corrupt or blind. I, for instance, go for regular religious worship, not because of those leaders but because of my convictions in my heart. I do not have the energy to fight the corrupt religious or political system. I can only wish you good luck”. I suffered from many discriminations, prejudices, violations of rights, and a false law-suit in the United States. I am suffering from denigrations and violations of  rights and a false law-suit in my country of birth (India). Yet these are the only two countries I wish to live, the oldest and the biggest democracies. Both have their strengths and drawbacks. In spite of adversities I am not a quitter as I am spiritually in a vigorous condition. I am just one person in this vast universe doing what I can. I know in my heart that ultimately Truth and Integrity will triumph. Life of truth is worth living no matter what.

Purpose of Life

What are we in this world for? What is the purpose of our life? These questions have absorbed the minds of scientists and believers all over the world from the beginning of conscious, human life. Science really has no answer. Purpose of life does not fall in the purview of science. Faith provides answers for the believers. Yet faith and science can work in harmony as the whole human endeavour is to find meaning for life.
When I left home at the age of 17 to become a sanyasi (monk) in a religious order, I was motivated by accomplishing my salvation. More concretely, I wanted to become a saint and bring others to God. Examining and analyzing my motive in becoming a monk years later, I came to the realisation that death anxiety among other considerations may also have played a major role in my decision. Existentialist psychologists consider death anxiety to be a great motivating factor. Bringing philosophy, theology, spirituality, and psychology to throw light on the purpose of life, ultimately the blind leap of faith alone can make any sense out of life. One has to believe in some kind of organising intelligence or higher power (God) to explain the universe.
Indian scriptures state: Ajnanenavrtam jnanam: Knowledge is covered by ignorance. The Hindu philosophy which is also theology holds that a human is born in ignorance, lives in ignorance, and dies in  ignorance. Ignorance is the chief enemy. Information from the outside world is subjected to experience and processed to acquire knowledge. Knowledge percolating into life through experience acquires insight and becomes wisdom. Wisdom through a difficult process of discernment removes avidya (non-knowledge) that are really different layers of maya (illusion) to attain moksha (liberation). This long and tedious process, of course, requires many transmigrations of the soul or rebirths.
Christianity holds  humans, except Christ and his earthly mother, Mary, are  born in original sin and suffer from the terrible effects of original sin. Christ came into this world to liberate humans from the devastating effects of the original sin. Belief in Christ as the saviour who mediates between God and human is necessary for the sanctifying grace that paves the way for salvation.
Both Hindu and Christian explanations and speculations are not satisfactory to the human mind in that both require faith. Should we then look for a third explanation that is related to conscience (antaryamin) that is in every human?! Here the formation of a conscience absorbing the best from every religion acquires supreme importance. Conscience formed by the best in all religions, and guided by a harmonious, blissful, universal value system headed by truth can set us free from all that prevents us from reaching the fullness of being (God). Here then Truth is God as  Mahatma Gandhi surmised, nay, concluded from his experiments with truth in his final stage of life.  We may not have much here, but this is all we have if we do not take the blind leap of faith. Yet once we take that leap of total surrendering, we can be like the baby in the hands of a fully trusted father, who is tossed in the air and enjoys the thrill and excitement of that bounce without any care in the world. We can also think of the Supreme Being (God) as the full reality reflecting in our consciousness as a good and clean mirror.

Man – Woman

After leaving the Jesuits in 1982, my wife and I decided to form a community (Commune) in the USA modelled on the basis of the early Christian community as described in the Acts of the Apostles (chapters 2 and 4). We strived to live a very simple life directed by the spirit. There were about 15 of us – 5 married couples and three women and two men – sharing all our resources, giving what we have and taking what we need. We mostly lived in very poor, run-down, inner-city, black neighbourhoods with minimum conveniences in St. Louis, Missouri. We communally owned an 80 acre-farm with a nice farm house on a beautiful river to have solitude and reflection from the hectic life of the St. Louis metropolis. In the city we tried to help the deprived and empower the poor. Equality of sexes and races was a prime concern in the Commune. After about five years of communal experiment, I began to notice the extreme feminism and gradual denigration of men that began to creep in. Some of the women in the Commune became very strident, loud, and even intolerant. They thought of every man taking part in patriarchy and oppressive structures that dominated women. They thought that men, growing up and programmed in a dominant, male chauvinistic culture, could not but dictate terms to women and use their power to control women knowingly or unwittingly. Even I who was a moderate feminist defending the rights of women and being conscientised about the indignities and discriminations that women suffer in a world of men could not change fast enough to suit their pace.
In my commune days I became very aware that the battle of sexes was brewing in the air especially in the West. The women’s liberation movements were afloat. And I thought the next war after the wars of races and castes would be that of genders. Unrest and agony have been widespread in the institution of marriage, the most sacred of relationships between a man and a woman. It is not uncommon to have media reports of spousal violence even to the point of a man killing his wife or a woman killing her husband. Talking of genders, my wife told me that men sometimes do not have a clue to what is going on in the mind of a woman. Half-jokingly she stated further that men do not understand women and women do not understand men. I mused: “Are we then condemned to be united in love?” Looking at me with a puzzling smile,  she said: “I guess so”. While men are trying to understand the feminine make and mystique, women are trying to figure out what clicks for men.
I have no doubt in my mind that both men and women can be violent. Culturally men are more likely to be aggressive and physically violent, while women tend to be passive-aggressive and emotionally violent. Men tend to dominate and intimidate women into subjugation; women enthral men to slow psychic enslavement. When benign understanding is not there, both cannot live with each other and cannot live without each other. The plain fact is that both need each other. When both complement each other and function as one entity as they are supposed to, the marital bliss is never-ending. Here then both, at least in a fantasy yearning, returns to the mythological state of Hermaphroditus – the fusing of the son of Greek god, Hermes, and love goddess, Aphrodite, with a nymph resulting in one person possessing the physical characteristics of both male and female. For us living in the present dispensation the only fair thing for both men and women is to respect the sexes and give them their human rights so that the war of genders can be avoided. At this moment it is good for a man to do some self-examination: “If I were a woman, would I like to be treated by the way men treat women? Women also can, in empathy, put themselves in the place of men.

Living in the Past

Most people are living in the past. They ruminate and waste their precious energy churning their memories deposited in their mind (chit). In Indian philosophy, chit is the reservoir of memories. The other day a close relative of mine talked about how he was not given a just portion of ancestral property. Unfortunately this is a story often heard in Kerala, India. In one way or another, this is not any different in other parts of the world. I have heard his story umpteen times in the past.  I have responded to his grievance.  His situation was taken into account and was amply compensated by a relative who decided not to take any ancestral property. It just does not matter.  His story is not in the past. His demeanor the way he narrates the story show his story is very alive in the present. And there is at least one culprit involved, and he does not have a good relationship with him. It consumes some of his energy. Everything that he says is coloured by his past experiences. A close American friend of mine told me how her sister went through her mother’s belongings soon after her mother’s death, and took all the jewelries and knick-knacks, and deprived her siblings of even some memorabilia that are only valuable to them. She was still emotionally chocked while narrating her story. A part of her energy was also tied down with her past which is still her present.  We see things and persons through the glasses that we wear. If we wear yellow glasses we may see everyone jaundiced.  If our glasses are dirty or clouded, we will not see anything clearly, and we may conclude that our object of perception is not clear. This is an instance of projection. We are familiar with situations when a person is angry with us but as far as that person is concerned we are angry with them. This is a clear instance of projection. The person projects one’s feelings onto us. We filter all realities and experiences through our personality. Our unique personality contains all our experiences, both pleasant and painful, that serve as filters for perceiving present experiences.
Once Mullah Nazruddin’s wife went to the local judge and complained about some unpleasant incident involving her husband. When the Mulla was asked to appear before the judge, he said: “Respected Judge, there are three versions or truths. One is hers, the other is mine, and the third, what actually happened.” There are as many different perceptions as there are experiences and realities. This is not to say that we do not agree on our perceptions or experiences. But we need to be ever vigilant so that our unresolved painful experiences of the past do not serve as filters for the present experiences and thus influence or change our perceptions. If the bad past unduly influences our present we are living in the past.  We go through motions, and function but we are not truly living in the here and now. We need to extricate ourselves from the chains of the past. In the West many go to a psychologist and work through problems resulting from the painful past through psychotherapy. In the East one is likely go to a guru or wise person for answers. Varieties of meditations and helping relationships can be of assistance.
Are we living in the past? Our emotional energy is what motivates us to perform various actions. If our personality is a captive of our toxic past, our actions or lack of certain altruistic behaviours partake of that malignant past. We are also laden with many burdens of the past that eat into our effectiveness and full and joyous living. To the extent our emotional energy for living in the now – the present is all that we really have – is tied down with the past painful or unpleasant experiences, we are not free to enjoy and celebrate, we are at least partially, if not fully, living in the past.

Formula of Life

Change in our consciousness will bring about change in the way we are, what we do and have. We have created the corrupt, greedy, immoral, hungry, and destructive world that deprives the overwhelming majority of inhabitants the necessities of life. We are our bothers’ and sisters’ keepers. We are for ourselves as well as for others. The ingredients of the formula for life are: Do to others what you like others to do to you (the Golden Rule). Treat others the same way you like to be treated. How do you like to be treated? Make an exhaustive list of the way you like to be treated. Now you know how to treat others. For instance, you like others to forgive you when you make a mistake; forgive them when they make a mistake.
• Accept yourself and others unconditionally. God does not create anything bad. We are all created by God; we are all good. God created us unconditionally, and loves us and accept us unconditionally. No apology for the way you are. You cannot help it. If others cannot accept you for who you are, it is their problem. Do not make their problem your problem.
•  Live in the present; live in the here and now. Yesterday is gone; tomorrow comes only in terms of today. Today was the tomorrow we worried about yesterday. Tomorrow will be amply taken care of if we live today fully.
• Non-violence, truth force, and respect for others need to be in all human and international transactions.
• Give to each one what is one’s due and more. Do not take advantage of anyone’s misfortune, hard labor, and sweat.
•  Do not fret over failures and waste precious energy fretting. Failure is part of human living. There is no human being who has not experienced it. Failure makes success even more enjoyable. Failure can be a stepping stone to success if used wisely.
•  Give everyone the benefit of the doubt and a good measure of compassion. Concession and compassion go hand in hand.
• Think before you say and act.
•  Be honest. Say what is on your mind, and mean what you say. Say only what is true. Nobody, except certain authorities for good governance or common good, has a right to certain information. It is good, though, to disclose everything to a few selected close friends.
• Thoughts cannot be controlled. They are neither good nor bad. They come and go. They become good or bad only when one consciously chooses them. Intentions can be controlled as they are acts of the will.
• Fear and anxiety cripple the human spirit, drain the human energy, lead to depression, and make life worth not living.
•  Keep your word. Do not make promises that you will not keep.
• Human freedom and perpetual vows do not go together. Freedom relates to a dynamic state, a vow relates to a static condition. Only doing God’s will at every moment is what is required of human beings as it is essential for holiness. That means on-going discernment. Humans continuously change over life-span.  A vow that is made at one period in life may not be relevant for another period. I will not recommend, except in the case of marriage, perpetual vows that will abridge human freedom.
• Eat nutritionally. Food is the first line of medication. Many diseases are due to poor eating habits. An old saying – an ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure – is worth remembering. First nutrition, then taste. Taste without nutrition spells disaster. Food prepared and handled without love and care is toxic; I will not recommend its consumption.
• Take care of your body in the best possible way; for it is the temple of the Holy Spirit.
•  Keep bodily, mental, and spiritual hygiene always. Make an examination of conscience at the end of every day, and come to terms with your own self, others, and God.
•  Have a sense of humour; laugh heartily; celebrate life; do not take life so seriously as not to be able to laugh at yourself and others. Some ingredients are essential; others enhance the flavour.

What a World? What is Life?

A mother in Vietnam gives up one of her identical twin girls at birth as she does not have the finances to take care of both. The girl lands up in California, USA, and after years is now ready to go to UCLA (University of California at Los Angeles) Medical School to become a doctor. She does not know the fate of her twin sister in Vietnam. As a refugee from Somalia in 1993, she finished her Bachelor’s degree in Minneapolis, Minnesota, and is collecting money for the starving children in Somalia. She knows starvation as she fled it when she was six years old. A girl from the orphanage of Mother Theresa’s Sisters of Charity in Calcutta adopted by a friend of mine in St. Louis, Missouri, is a surgeon. She wonders about the children left behind in the orphanage in Calcutta. A boy who was given birth by a 15 year old Brahmin girl in Chennai and abandoned to die in a garbage barrel was salvaged and adopted years ago in USA is a smart young man doing very well. Girls in USA are trying to connect with disadvantaged girls in the world through Girl Up, a campaign of the United Nations Foundation. Many poor children, especially  girls, in Africa and Asia who spent most of their waking hours trying to fetch water and firewood to cook the little food they have to barely stay alive. The irony is many affluent girls in the USA are obsessed with their weight and shape, and succumb to Anorexia Nervosa or Bulimia Nervosa (Eating Disorders related to excessive obsession with body shape and weight) while many children ( girls and boys) in the world die of malnutrition or starvation. They also have too many outfits, and are faced with a decision as to what to wear every morning or for a special occasion while many girls in Asia and Africa do not have a change of clothes or are in tatters.
I have been back in the United States from India for about five weeks. The debate about raising the Debt Ceiling so the US would not default on its debt on August 2, 2011, was on everybody’s mind, and consumed a great deal of time and energy through meaningless bickering and theatrics, and brought the US and the world (the US economy, the biggest in the world, affects the global economy) to the brink of an economic disaster. Still the last minute bill passed in both houses of the US legislative body and signed by the US president sent economic shock waves across the world. The debate showed that the government is not only divided but it is dysfunctional. The politicians in the US as well as in India are mostly irrational, and cater to people’s emotions, and tell the majority of unthinking people what they want to hear to get elected.  Individuals, families, and governments living beyond their means and spending money that they do not have through unscrupulous borrowing or deficit financing are creating  unsustainable and artificial economies that are not related to realities in many developed countries, especially the US, Greece, Spain, Italy.  This tragic situation adversely affects hard-working persons who consciously live within their income. Another thing I observed was the preoccupation with temperature and how that affects every one’s work and life. The temperature in St. Louis has been in the 90’s Fahrenheit (90F=32.2C). The effect on people of the frequent weather broadcast during the day, and the dramatic moan and groan the weather broadcaster gives while broadcasting with also the heat index is very profound indeed. Hardly a conversation without the mention of how hot the weather is. [Needless to say, I prefer the naturally air-conditioned weather (mostly in the 70’s F or below throughout the year) around the Ashram in Munnar, India.] What kind of a world are we living in? What is life after all? Are the things that need to prepare us for a rich purposeful life eluding us?

Healthy Spirituality

I have been writing about spirituality beyond religions. Yet it is important to understand healthy religion. To me healthy religion is not anything different from healthy spirituality. I would like to use a simple metaphor. We have light coming from the sun. When this light passes through a prism, we get the beautiful seven rainbow cs: violet, indigo, blue, green, yellow, orange, and red, (VIBGYOR). Now I would like to think of sun-light as spirituality bursting through the prism of the universe into so many colours as religions. There are so many religions, denominations, and cults as so many combinations of colours, hues, and shades. Incidentally something that begins as a cult over a long period of time can acquire respectability and end up being a religion. Persons can seriously study various religions, and embrace the one that has the characteristics of the Kingdom of God: a kingdom where supreme values such as love, truth, freedom, justice, peace, equality, respect, acceptance, forgiveness, reconciliation, compassion, mercy, and tolerance reign.
Our God is the One who lets the sun shine on the good as well as the bad, who lets the rain fall on the righteous as well as the wicked, and who lets the crops flourish side by side with the weeds. Let God alone be the judge of all persons and situations. We actualise our potentials to the best of our ability; we become what we are capable of becoming; and we do the best we can. Once we have done everything that we could, we leave everything to God not being attached to the fruits of our actions. We take from the earth and our universe only the resources that we need, mindful of ecology and the need of our fellow human beings. We become co-creators with God contributing our share and leaving to posterity a world better than the one we inherited. To me this is Sanatan Dharma (Forever Righteous Living).

On Religions

From many years of studies of world history, experience and observation I have come to the conclusion that religions have failed in bringing persons closer to God and to one another. Instead of their becoming signs of realities beyond this world that made life livable, fulfilling, and blessed, they have become anti-signs fostering self-righteous attitudes, intolerance, crass discrimination, gross persecution, and even cruel and incredible murders. They are capable of arousing passions of people to the point that people have been and still are killing one another in the name of the same one God. They neglect realities of this world for matters of faith and dogmas. They define matters of faith that in reality cannot be defined. They threaten with anathemas those who honestly and in good conscience disagree with them. They sincerely in their blindness believe that every good and intelligent person should believe what they believe. They feel they are the administrators of truth. They believe that those who do not see things the way they see are in reality misguided and are to be pitied.
Let us, for instance, take the four major world religions. The Christians believe that they alone possess the truth revealed through Jesus Christ, and that there is no salvation without belief in Saviour Jesus Christ. Muslims believe that the Christians have corrupted scriptures handed down to them and gone astray and the Jews deserve Allah’s wrath, and Quran corrects the Christian Scriptures as the final word of Allah given to Mohammed, the greatest and the final prophet. The Hindus believe one’s actions determine the kind and number of incarnations until one attains liberation through dissolution into the Supreme Being. The Buddhists believe that one can attain nirvana (final bliss) through one’s own effort by following Buddha’s prescription. Such mutually exclusive, differing, and even contradictory view-points of religions saw seeds for strife, dissension, and quarrels. Where is then the place for love, compassion, mercy, forgiveness, and justice? We have known, for instance, nations believing in the same religion fighting each other and praying to God for victory of their side. Depending on needs some people have prayed for rain while others have prayed that there may be no rain. What can God do?
Herein comes the need for spirituality beyond religions or for higher consciousness. At the outset I need to mention that I am not against religions, and I respect all religions whether I agree with them or not. Respect for others is imperative in any society.  Religions need to purify themselves and find their original vision and mission. They need to work together so people can increase their ability to love all human beings who are made in the image of God, or who all are sparks of divine consciousness. Religions need to stop infantilising human beings. They need to stop advocating for their vested interests.  Instead of shrinking the inner freedom through their diktats, they need to help all enjoy the glorious freedom of God’s children. God gave human beings freedom even to reject Him. Just to take a few examples, Christ allowed Judas, one of his close disciples, to take part in his Last Supper considered to be the first Eucharistic celebration (Mass) knowing Judas would betray him. Will a catholic priest give Holy Communion to a person knowing that he would betray Christ? Can a Muslim change his religion without any fear of being harmed? Can a Hindu change his religion without being harassed? There are many other questions that deal with a person’s fundamental rights. The need for spirituality beyond religions or higher consciousness in a pluralistic society is essential and is really the need of the hour.

Our Attitude

A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package. ‘What food might this contain?’ The mouse anxiously kept looking at the packet. It was devastated to discover that it was mouse trap. Retreating to the farm yard, the mouse proclaimed the warning: There is a mouse trap in the house. The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, “Mr. Mouse, I can tell that it is a grave concern for you. But I need not be bothered about that.” The pig said to the mouse, “ I’m very sorry Mr. Mouse. But there is nothing I can do about it except praying for you.” The cow said to the mouse, “I’m sorry, but its no skin off my nose.” The mouse returned to the house quite dejected and disappointed.

That very night, a sound was heard and the farmer’s wife rushed to mouse trap. It was a venomous snake whose tail was caught in the trap. The snake bit the lady and she was taken to the hospital. She later returned with a fever. To treat fever, the farmer went for a chicken soup and the chicken was killed. His wife’s sickness continued and friends and relatives came to sit with her. To feed the visitors, the farmer had to butcher the pig. Still, his wife died. Many people came for the funeral.

The farmer had the cow also slaughtered to provide enough meat for all of them. The mouse looked upon it all from his crack in the wall with great sadness. The story reminds how dangerous the risk is any one of us faces and the relevance of helping others in risk.

All of us have an attitude toward life based on our life experiences. If we have had overwhelmingly positive experiences, we would have a positive, optimistic, friendly, benign, and trusting attitude. On the other hand, if our experiences were predominantly negative, our attitude toward and approach to life would likely be negative, pessimistic, cautious, cynical, and distrusting.  Our experiences, especially the early ones during our formative years, will determine our view of the world and our philosophy of life whether we are conscious of them or not. In my over forty years of mental health work with clients, I would reassure them at the end of each session saying: “Things will work out”. What am I really meaning by this? Things will work out one way or the other, and the one way is not necessarily better than the other in the long run. In other words, things may not work out the way we would like but the way they work out can be to our advantage if we have the right kind of and accepting attitude toward life. 
Often things happen the way they happen, and we have little choice. The way we take them makes the whole difference. For instance, I have seen two women of comparable looks, education, accomplishments, and socio-economic and mental status have been brutally sexually assaulted. One of them is going from one mental hospital to another, and the other one is on national television (USA) immensely popular with incredible wealth. The personal factor that made the difference was their attitude. The bad thing that we think is happening to us may turn out to be a great blessing. This is what we call blessings in disguise. 
Take, for instance, the story of one of my clients. He was very emotionally upset, distraught, and inconsolable about a plane that was going to take him to a fortune, and that he missed due to no fault of his own. He was driving to the airport. On the way close to the airport there was a huge tanker truck carrying oil met with an accident, and turned over spilling thousands of litters of oil making the only road to the airport impassable and also tying up traffic for miles. Meanwhile he saw the plane that he was to be in flying overhead. He cursed and cussed, and mourned his misfortune, finally turned around and went home. After half an hour close to home he heard on the radio in his car that the plane that he was supposed to be in crashed due to bad weather, and all perished. He got out of the car and danced for joy.
There is a popular saying in the USA: 
“When you get a lemon (standing for a used bad car bought or more generally for a bad situation) make lemonade”. We have to play the hands that we are dealt with. Often we have to take what we are meted out and make the best of it. Epictetus, a Roman philosopher, who lived around the time of Christ, made a very wise observation: 
“It is not what happens to you that matters, but it is what you make of what happens to you that matters”.  This observation is one of the great principles of Cognitive behaviour Therapy as well as Rational Emotive Therapy in psychology. When we know we are going to fall, do not resist the fall, but fall and roll so the impact is spread over many points, and the fall becomes less hurting. What is our attitude?  Do we waste our precious energy fretting over things that we cannot do anything about? On account of our negative attitude, do we become our own worst enemies, our own worst nightmares?  Life is full of problems. Are we creative in problem-solving? Everything that happens to us in life, no matter how costly and painful, contains a message for own growth and development if we with resignation, acceptance, and patience are able to decipher that message. Is our attitude positive  –  one of accepting and celebrating life on life’s own terms, one of gratitude? Do we need an attitudinal adjustment?

Judge Not Lest You Be Judged

It is very common for people to judge others. It is bad to judge others, but it is even worse to judge their intentions. Yet we do it all the time. It is also very common to suspect others, especially persons that we do not trust or like. We conveniently forget the Golden Rule formulated by the Prophet of Nazareth: 
“Do to others what you like others to do to you (Mt.7, 12)”. Jesus declared that the entire law and the prophets are contained in this rule. If we follow this rule we do not need any other as all other rules, regulations, and guidelines for our life follow from this one supreme rule. It is also important to mention that this Rule was stated in another way by Confucius in his Analects: 
“Do not do to others what you do not want them to do to you”. We want others to think well of us. If things can be interpreted in a positive or negative light, we want others to look at us favourably giving us the benefit of the doubt. Not only are we not willing to give others the benefit of the doubt, we are not even willing to concede that other persons are capable of changing for the better as we are. How often have I heard: 
“Oh, he/she is never going to change”!
Today’s homework is: “How do I like to be treated by others?” I will have the answer for treating others.

Why Worry?

A great deal of our precious energy is wasted throughout life by worrying. This energy is not available for our constructive and creative life. Psychologists think that our worrying begins around the age of three. It can lead to many psychogenic and functional diseases such as ulcers, tension headaches, hypertension, panic and anxiety attacks. It negatively affects our immune system. Worry is a form of anxiety related to a future outcome. We have a desired outcome. But we do not know what is going to happen, and we have no control over it. 
The Serenity Prayer by Reinhold Niebhur can be a remedy for worrying. The first part of it says: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference”. Nishkamakarmavruti (not being attached to the fruits of one’s actions) taught by Bhagwad Gita can also be of great help. Doing what one is supposed to do without being concerned about success or failure. Ignatius of Loyola, a great saint and the founder of the Jesuits, spoke about holy indifference in his Spiritual Exercises. He advised his followers to have equanimity in short life or long life, in sickness or health, in poverty or wealth. Worry is related to our desires and expectations. Gautam Buddha stated that desiring what we cannot have or obtain leads to unhappiness. To eliminate unhappiness we need to stop desiring. But desiring not to desire is itself a desire.  Therefore desire only what can be obtained: not any more, not any less. But how can that be achieved? Buddha proposes the eight fold path: right view, right intention, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness, right concentration. 
I used to tell my clients to worry only if worrying helps them. And I cannot think of anyone who was helped by worrying. Philosophy from the trenches told by a wise man can help all of us. The story goes this way: “Either you are selected for the army or you are not. If you are not, you do not need to worry. If you are, you are sent to fight or not. If you are not, you do not need to worry. If you are, you are sent to the front line or not. If you are not, you do not need to worry. If you are, you are wounded or not. If you are not wounded, you do not need to worry. If you are, you are lightly or seriously wounded. If you are lightly wounded, you do not need to worry. If you are seriously wounded, you either get well or you die. If you get well, you do not need to worry; if you die, you cannot worry. So why worry?

Passive, Aggressive, Assertive

Passiveness, aggressiveness, and assertiveness are personality characteristics. While passiveness and aggressiveness are at the opposite poles, assertiveness is in the middle range.  An aggressive personality is arrogant, imposing, overbearing, and obnoxious. A passive personality is submissive ever striving to yield, please, and placate. A person with an assertive personality is well-adjusted, resilient, tolerant, balanced, and fearless yet sensitive. An aggressive person acts out and takes out on others; he/she disregards others’ rights and alienates them.  A passive person acts in, and often silently suffers swallowing disagreeable stuff. An assertive person expresses what is on mind and holds one’s own ground often agreeing to disagree in an agreeable way.
In a world that is becoming more and more aggressive, demanding, and self-righteously insisting on one’s rights while neglecting one’s obligations, assertive skills are very much  in need. At the risk of broad and stereotypical generalisations, I venture a few comments. While western personality tends to be aggressive-aggressive, eastern personality tends to be passive-aggressive. The western personality tends to look for immediate gratification; the eastern personality tends to unduly delay gratification of desires. The immediate gratification as well as undue delay of gratification brings in its wake distinctive emotional and mental problems. There is a physical and an emotional cost for both. With an aggressive-aggressive personality, a person is likely to relentlessly take an aggressive course often without thinking through, and causes grave damage to all including self.
An aggressive person is like a bull in a china shop; destroys everything in its path. The passive-aggressive person keeps on absorbing negative and bad feelings, builds up until he/she cannot contain anymore, and finally blows up in a great explosion causing harm to all. With the world shrinking fast at an exponential rate, and becoming a global park as a result of massive communication and connectivity, the comments above may be dated. The younger generations in India appear to be markedly more aggressive than the older ones. Westernisation often appears to be mistaken for modernisation. It is of paramount importance that we retain our best eastern values while assimilating the best in the West.

Managing Anger

Unhappiness results when desires are frustrated, when expectations are thwarted. Unhappiness leads to frustration, and frustration leads to depression or anger. Depression can lead to despair, paralysis, and even suicide or death. Anger often ends in verbal or physical aggression. Verbal abuse at times can cause greater damage than physical abuse. Anger is one of the primary emotions that help persons cope with life’s events. People generally think of it as a negative, bad emotion. Like any other emotion, it is neither bad nor good. When properly managed and channeled, it can be a constructive, motivating energy for achieving one’s goals. It can mobilise scattered energy into a concentrate just enough to realise one’s immediate aim that otherwise might not have been reached. It can drive a person to higher and higher levels of excellence as well as success. In an impulsive person, it can be a destructive and devastating force. St. Paul writing to the Ephesians said: “Be angry, but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger (4, 26 &31)”. It is alright to be angry as anger has a rightful place in the nature of things; but it should not lead to unwholesome behaviouurs. Nursing prolonged bitterness, anger, and wrath can pave the way for grudge and even revenge. Harbouring any kind of resentment, malice, and a desire for retaliation is not conducive to healthy spiritual, mental, and physical life.
It is of utmost importance to keep in mind that other people or events beyond our control cannot make us angry. My clients often used to say: “So and so made me so mad”.  And I corrected them saying: “You let yourself get angry”. In final analysis we allow ourselves to be affected by others or events; we allow ourselves to get angry and upset.  We know, for instance, the same or similar things said or done by different people have different effects on us. People who are close to us affect us more intensely than others who are not. If we do not want to be affected by others, we need to stay emotionally distant from them. But that is not helpful either. Our life would be emotionally very poor. As there cannot be a mountain-top without a valley, there cannot be intense joy without intense pain.
A rich life is one of contrasts. How we lead our life is our choice. Taking responsibility for our anger can help us control and direct our anger. When in anger it is wise not to say or do anything. It is wise not to make any impulsive decisions. It is wise not to punish our children in anger. We are liable to use more force than necessary. We do not want to say or do anything that we will regret later or that will get us just the opposite of what we want. Here it may be in order to say that I am totally against physical punishment as it relates only to the animal part of a human being.  If we examine ourselves we will have examples of things that we did or said in anger that we regretted later on.
Fear and anger can be deadly. We have heard the story of the lady killing her pet mongoose that saved her child’s life from a deadly snake. Seeing blood on the mouth of the mongoose, she wrongly assumed that it had hurt her child. In reality the mongoose had killed the snake. When things done in anger, even our so-called victories are Pyrrhic in nature. If not properly managed even our righteous anger can destroy us as well as others.
I am often asked as to how to let go of anger. And my answer is simple. If your anger serves a useful, beneficial purpose, keep it; if not, let it go. Very easily said; very difficult to put it into practice. In about 40 years of mental health practice in India and the USA, I cannot recall a single person who said that holding on to anger has been helpful. But how to let it go? The first thing is to want to let go of it. This denotes the intention to release the anger. Once the will to let go of anger is set in motion, and the informed decision that letting go is more advantageous than holding on to the anger is made, sheer enlightened self-interest kicks in. Enlightened self-interest is the result of a well-executed assessment that holding on to anger is more harmful to the person who clings onto it than to the person at whom it is directed. In reality a negative and burdensome emotion is renting space in the inner life of a person. It negatively influences that person and weighs that person down while paying no rent. Once the conscious decision to let go is made, the emotions will fall in line.  In technical terms, the emotional (affective) release will follow the intentional (cognitive) release. Emotions are charged energies like spirited horses ready to prance; but they need to be reined in by the mind. The emotional release will take time depending on personality factors, level of maturity, spiritual disposition, and one’s world-view.  A person who is cynical, has a distrustful view of life, and who had an overwhelmingly negative experience of the hostile world around in early years of life will have extreme difficulty in letting go of anger and forgiving. On the other hand, a person who is secure, and has very little need for controlling others, and has an optimistic outlook on life will have little difficulty in letting go of cumbersome anger.
Letting go of anger becomes easier and easier as time goes by, and also as one experiences the benefits of it.  As a result of letting go, one becomes more compassionate, understanding, empathic, tolerant, and aware; less judgmental, less dogmatic, and less  critical; one is less tired, more energetic and enthusiastic, more accepting of self and others;  one enjoys life more fully.
Persons who cause suffering to others, and occasion anger in them truly suffer from ignorance (avidya). If nothing else works, the fact they are ignorant, and the fact they are their own worst enemies is an adequate reason to let go of anger and to make the best out of life for all.

Celebrating Life Today

Most people just exist and function; but life is to be lived, loved, and celebrated. Every moment is precious. Life is to be lived from the perspective of eternity. If I were to view my entire life on a large screen a few minutes before my death, what things would I change? Well, I have that chance since I am alive. I have the choice to live my life just the way I want taking into account all my limitations and external restrictions. Often I do not have a choice about my life situation. The Prophet of Nazareth said: “Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul (Mat. 10, 28).
Life is to be lived in the here and now. All I have is now, this present moment. The next moment is not promised. The eleven persons so far killed in one of the most heinous terrorist acts in Pune on February 13, 2010, never thought that morning that they would not see another day. So I have to live every moment as if it were my last moment. When I was training graduate students in counselling and psychotherapy I used to tell them that people who are not ready to face death have not really started living. People need to live the way they want to die. They really need to be prepared to die at any time. The kind of one’s end is determined by the quality of one’s life. Yesterday is gone forever. Tomorrow never comes. Tomorrow comes only in terms of today. So what we have is only today. The tomorrow we worried about yesterday is today. We can waste today worrying about tomorrow; or we can live today to the full. The best way to prepare for tomorrow is to learn from yesterday and to live today well facing today’s problems and challenges and making the best possible decisions. Wasting today worrying about tomorrow or trying to control things that we have no control over, I am reminded of the two kids who were given three ladoos (sweets)each. One kid looked intently at the other kid’s ladoos wishing to have them also for himself. Meanwhile a cat came and ran away with his.
An inspirational message under the heading Living Life to the Fullest a friend of mine from the USA sent to me recently via e-mail had this to say: “First, I was dying to finish my high school and start college. And then I was dying to finish college and start working. Then I was dying to marry and have children. And then I was dying for my children to grow old enough so I could go back to work. But then I was dying tretire. And now I am dying…And suddenly I realised I forgot to live. Please don’t let this happen to you. Appreciate your current situation and enjoy each day…old friend.       
To make money we lose our health, and then to restore our health we lose our money…We live as if we are never going to die, and we die as if we never lived.  Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away. “It is not how much time we have on this earth that matters; it is how we live the time that we actually have. So seize the day (cape diem); celebrate each moment.

Vital Signs of Mental Health

When a person is brought to the emergency room of a hospital, certain vital signs of physical health are taken. Essentially blood pressure, pulse rate, respirations, and temperature are checked. Then neural check may be done; reflexes may be checked; further tests related to the reason for admission may be ordered. These checks and tests if done aid in the proper diagnosis and formulation of a treatment plan. Similarly there are vital signs of mental and spiritual health. In this short article vital signs of emotional or mental health is explored.
When an emotionally disordered or mentally deranged person is seen by a psychiatrist or a clinical psychologist, a mental status examination is performed. Through this assessment a person’s reality testing is checked. What is looked for is a person’s ability to adjust, adapt, and live according to norms in a given society, function meaningfully, relate to others (family, friends, co-workers, persons in authority, subordinates, other members in society), work, dispense one’s obligations, enjoy one’s privileges, and experience satisfaction, pleasure, and happiness in life. Typically a person’s orientation to the three spheres, (place, person, and time), insight and judgment (good or poor), affect (appropriate, inappropriate, flat, restricted), thought (rational, irrational, peculiar), intellectual ability, personality disorders, unusual experiences, irrational fears (phobias), obsessions and compulsions, traumatic or catastrophic experiences, losses, addictions, and substance use are evaluated.
Let us look at a few examples.  To a question: In what way an orange and a banana alike? One might answer: both are fruits, another might answer: both have peels, and a third might answer: one is round and the other is long. These three answers indicate three distinct reasoning levels of a person. To a question: Would you jump into a lake to save a drowning person knowing that you cannot swim? if the answer is yes, it indicates poor judgment. If one answers yes to a question, Do you see things that are not there? We know that person has visual hallucinations. A comprehensive interview consisting of detailed and probing questions as well as clinical observations during the interview can elicit an accurate diagnosis in view of an adequate treatment plan.
In sum: an emotionally healthy person is oriented, has bright affect, good insight and judgment, is able to enjoy work and life, have fun, develop and maintain good (not exploitative) relationships, and problem-solve, has good decision-making skills and a good attitude toward life, has a high level of energy, and is flexible enough to adapt to new situations and to compromise without sacrificing one’s values, and has good coping skills in stressful situations.

Signs of Spiritual Health

I left Kerala, India, at 17 years of age after the Secondary School Leaving Certificate (SSLC) which in those days involved 11 years of primary, middle, and high school education. I left moved by what I considered to be a call from God to save my soul and those of others. I lived in different parts of India; I lived 35 years in the USA.  After 53 years of intense search, studies in philosophy, education, theology, and psychology, and after as many years of training in spirituality as well as avid reading and studies in history, comparative religion, and models of spirit-life, I arrived at what I consider to be the most important signs of spiritual health. I am going to list them below in order of importance without elaborating them.
• Purity of being, intention, and means
• Holy indifference/affective detachment
• Self-transparence as a mode of conscious being
• Decision-making as a result of continuous discernment
• On-going experience of inner freedom/glorious liberty of God’s children
• A continuous, relentless search for truth
• Acceptance of one’s strengths as well as weaknesses or limitations
• Levelling-up: No one is more important or less important as a human being
• A deep awareness that physical and emotional pain are part of one’s life, growth, and development
• An unlimited, unconditional, and ever-increasing capacity to forgive hurts, injustice, discrimination, and unfair treatment
• Non-exploitative human relationships that are mutual and infinitely respectful of the other person/s
• A deep awareness of the spirituality of sexuality
• Nutritional eating, appropriate clothing, and proper hygiene
• Continuous effort at integrating being, doing, and having
• Mindfulness as conscious presence to the unity of humanity; a deep respect for the entire universe
• Realistic acceptance of death as an inevitable end to life.
Signs of spiritual life can come under a unifying philosophy of life one develops for oneself. I hope to write on these signs in the future.

Who Am I?

Who are we? How free are we? Do we experience the freedom that God and nature intended us to have? These questions haunt me still after living and working in the world’s two greatest democracies: India and the USA. Who am I? relates to my identity. How free am I? relates to my freedom – the most distinctive characteristic of a human being. They are essentially and inseparably inter-connected. From my experience and clinical practice I have come to the conclusion that we are heavily programmed and conditioned from birth by our parents, relatives, teachers, religious leaders, politicians, society and culture, and advertisements and commercials. The more programmed we are the less free we are. While the formation of a conscience based on universal moral and ethical principles is essential, we rarely pause to look at those pervasive and pernicious forces that diminish, eat into like termites, and even destroy our freedom. In a way we are all like the elephant in a circus that is trained to perform by a trainer and his/her whip. Does the elephant know that it can toss the trainer with the whip and create havoc? Of course we do not need to create havoc, but we may need to throw out many of our trainers/leaders.

I am reminded of a story. A farmer living at the edge of a forest went for a walk one day and found a lion cub. He brought it home and started raising it with his sheep. After a year or so the cub became a full-grown lion, but ate, bleated, and behaved in every respect like a sheep. One day a lion showed up, and all the sheep including the lion-sheep ran for life. The lion caught up with the lion-sheep that asked for mercy. The lion tried to convince the lion-sheep about its true identity. But the lion-sheep would not go for it. Finally the lion took the lion-sheep to the edge of a pond, and asked it to look into the water when the lion-sheep gave out a big roar. At that moment the lion-sheep became aware of its true identity. Most of us are not aware of our true identity. If we were we would not be behaving the way do. We would be letting go of many fetters and baggage that immobilise us.
Any person desiring to live a full life fulfilling the destiny that God has placed in that person needs to look at anything and everything that is thought, spoken, or done. This means we are required to live a conscious and conscientious life free of fear and guilt. Socrates, a great seer, said that an unexamined life is not worth living. Mahatma Gandhi was censored and ostracised by his community for crossing the ocean and going abroad. Many customs and practices of the recent past, for example, on the basis of race, caste, creed, and sex were utterly immoral, evil, and inhuman. Yet they were sanctioned or condoned by most of the so-called religious and spiritual leaders of the time. Would someone, for instance, who is going to betray Jesus Christ be given Holy Communion in a church today? Certainly not. But Jesus Christ not only gave communion to Judas, one of his 12 chosen disciples but also told him to go and do what he had planned. God permits human beings even to reject God. Why do we humans who are called to be God-like take away from other humans the very freedom that God has given? Each one of us is unique, and each one of us has a unique role to play in this world. Nobody is big or nobody is small as a human being. We are all one in the One. The greatest thing that a human being can do is to live a life of true identity, freedom, and awareness wherein none is abused or diminished, and everyone is respected, enhanced, loved, and cared for.
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